Pretre's Adoption Blog

Lost Angel

2012-02-02T17:58:00.001-06:00

I was saddened to read of the passing of 8 y.o. Brandon Kerr, adopted from Ukraine last May. He was injured in a bike accident and died yesterday. His funeral is this coming Saturday. Please remember the Kerr family.

Following Closely

The emotions of sadness I feel are like when I read the Patterson's story about their little adopted daughter Chrissie who passed away in May 2010. The Patterson's are in Ukraine right now adopting two little boys.

"I Feel Lucky"

2012-01-19T13:20:00.000-06:00

Meet Anna.

"Every little girl loves a pretty new dress, and my daughter Anna was no exception. Trembling with emotion, she ripped open the department store bag that contained her new dress, tights, shoes, and undergarments. Then she pulled out the lavender floral print dress, caressing the silk lining and rubbing her face in the soft fabric. Platya, she whispered. Dress. The quiet was only momentary, though, as the reality of the situation sank in. Platya, she then cheered. Halya doma. Halya is going home. Although it was the first time in her life that she had ever owned any piece of clothing, it was not the dress that brought such emotion, but what it represented. The new dress meant that it was finally the day that Halya (whom we would name Anna) would leave the orphanage and travel home to live with her new family."

Anna was born with special needs in Ukraine and adopted at age 3 by Rob & Deb Amend. Their story is inspirational, as you will see in the videos, below. The quote above is from Deb's book, A Dress for Anna.

Here is a portion of one of Anna's poems, "Where I'm From".

"In an old scrapbook I can see
A lot of pictures with faces I know.
The faces of those who have changed so
But I wanted to capture you in one moment we’ll both remember.
From my best friend’s rare smiles to my parents radiating laughs.
It is from those memories that I know and love.
It is from those memories that I am from."

You can read all of it here. I really liked it.

The title of this post comes from something that Anna says in this first video: Most kids from orphanages never get adopted.

video platform video management video solutions video player

Возвращение

2012-01-16T18:12:00.000-06:00

OK so I'm a little late to this party, but I saw on someone else's blog that they had recently watched the Russian movie called, "The Return", released in 2003. It centers around 2 young brothers, living with their mother and grandmother, when their father returns after a 12-year absence. The kids don't know this man at all and there is all kinds of mystery and suspense when he takes them on a week-long trip to go fishing. What's the real reason behind this? The film ends in tragedy and leaves the viewer with a lot of questions. In fact, it reminds me of the Yozhik cartoon that I posted about last March. It's one of those films that causes you to search for the meaning of it all. As one of the commentators observed, "Americans in general do not tend to appreciate the ambiguous or 'unfulfilling' endings found in many foreign movies. We tend to like our movies to come in neat little packages with crystal-clear morals and messages. I love movies like this one just because it avoids the 'complete' ending that so many movie viewers seem to want or need."

I mention this in the context of this adoption blog because it is a story about two boys that have grown up without a father and the emotions that surface when he comes back. The kids that all of us have adopted have sad pasts. Though it is mostly kid-safe in terms of language, nudity, etc., a movie like this could dredge up feelings that are tough to deal with, so I would caution that you watch it without your kids.

The 143 IMDb reviews are very interesting. Reading some of them helped me to process the movie. I liked the way it ended because, rather than being told what to think, it is left to me to decide what it means. Rather than one ending, there are many, depending on how the viewer interprets it. I caution you not to read the reviews before you watch it so that it doesn't give away the turn of events. There are many interpretations that could be given, so read about them after watching.

The movie is in Russian, with English subtitles. This is a case where I wish I knew Russian, because the Russian-speaking commentators say that some of the double-meanings are lost when translated to English. Besides the story, the cinematography is breathtaking, being filmed entirely in Russia. As I was watching the wide shots, I was thinking how this scene or that would have made a great photo. And the movie goes on like this for 1 3/4 hrs. It is simply stunning. As one of the commentators wrote, "Pause any given scene within the film and you'll have a frame worthy of entering into photography contests! Every shot is astounding."

The film has won many awards at international film festivals. Sadly, Vladimir Garin, the actor who played the older brother, died shortly after filming, before it was released, and was never able to see its success. He drowned at age 16 in the same lake where this movie was filmed.

Don't be in a hurry when you watch it. Give it the time it deserves.

Одесса, одесситы и другие прелести города

2012-01-11T22:34:00.002-06:00

Here's a music video filmed in Odessa by the Ukrainian singer Margarita Yanchuk. If you've spent time in Odessa you may recognize some of the popular sites such as the Opera House, Deribasovskaya Street, Potempkin Stairs, Duc de Richelieu Monument, City Hall, Privoz Market, and Vorontsov's Palace (where our son Sergey's Godmother is the director).

Oh and the name of the music video is the title of this post, "Odessa, Odessa and other flavors of the city".

Via Ukraine

2011-12-19T20:28:00.000-06:00

Over the years I have read a lot of helpful Ukraine adoption blogs. Of course, you already know about the 573+ blogs of completed adoptions in my links. There is a wealth of information in there for you who are working on or considering an adoption from Ukraine. I always add the date on the link so that you can quickly go into their blog archive and see the posts specifically related to their time in Ukraine.

Last week, I came across what I think is the most helpful blog I've ever seen for Ukraine adoptions. It is anonymous, so this mom isn't afraid to talk about any issue. I've added it to my links, it is called Via Ukraine. Go take a look at it (it has the coolest background ever).

Through It All, Thanksgiving

2011-11-24T10:10:00.001-06:00

Today is Thanksgiving Day in America, a day that our country sets aside to be thankful for the many blessings we have received. It's an important family day, too. Thanksgiving just isn't the same if you can't spend it with people you care about.

On Thanksgiving Day 3 years ago, we had our SDA appointment in Kyiv for adopting our children Valya and Sergey. You can read about that here. It was a somewhat difficult day in unfamiliar surroundings, not special at all to anyone around us, no different than any other day. Our Thanksgiving "meal" was unrecognizable food in the food court of the Globus mall in Independence Square. But it was very symbolic for us to have the opportunity to increase our family on Thanksgiving Day. We were, truly, thankful.

Three years have passed and now our family has been turned upside down with events that have caused a lot of pain and heartache. I will only share what is public that everyone who knows us already knows. In July, our daughter gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. Our granddaughter was put up for adoption and the family took her home from the hospital at birth. The events leading up to that were not good and one of our sons no longer lives with us. He is receiving counseling, and hopefully will get the help he needs. Our daughter is also being counseled, working through many things. The rest of us have gone through counseling too, trying to deal with our emotions. I have told people that I have experienced every emotion possible over the last year. It has not been easy but I think we are beginning to heal.

Valya asked me the other day if I regretted adopting. Truthfully, we did not expect this situation and it has been so difficult. But I told her, no, of course not. We love her no matter what. This is one of the positives of what happened. She has learned about the unfailing love of parents. Something she didn't have in Ukraine. We see our son often, and he still comes over. We also reassure him that we love him as well. We are hoping that someday we will be together again.

Last weekend we were all together and took a family picture. It was like old times again.

For the last three years I have written one of the Advent devotionals for our church. I wrote one this year and the scripture for the day is 1 Thess 5:12-24. I will close by sharing it with you, too.

“Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances” If you were to ask me the difference between a Christian and a non-Christian, I think these words from today’s scripture would sum it up very well. It’s easy to be happy when everything is going well. And it’s easy to be thankful when we have what we want. I saw a t-shirt once that said: I’m easy to get along with… as long as you do things my way! It’s meant to be humorous but, really, there’s a deeper truth here, which is that we are all selfish by nature. When things don’t go our way, we get angry, or anxious, or afraid. Is there anything in your life today that causes you to not be joyful or thankful? Most of us have something. But God’s word for us today is that we are to recognize that He loves us so much that we can give our troubles to Him. There’s a song we sing in church that says in part, “I’m trading my sorrows, I’m trading my sickness, I’m trading my shame, I’m laying them down for the joy of the Lord.” This past year has been a difficult one for our family. I’ve asked so many times, Why did this have to happen? There are no easy answers, and yet, we lay it down and choose to rejoice, pray, and give thanks. May the peace of that starry night in Bethlehem rest on you today and always! Amen.

UPDATE

Last night, someone on FB shared this video from a Ukrainian pastor who passed away only a couple of days ago. It is about being thankful in the midst of suffering. Pastor Peter had been suffering from cancer and was near the end of his life when he preached this to his Odessa church on Oct. 24, 2011. He uses the same verse from Thessolonians that I used in my Advent devotional above. As you hear him speaking of bread, know that he himself wasn't able to eat because of his cancer.

Hard Times

2011-07-14T17:29:00.003-05:00

I haven't been tending to the blog for a long time. Those of you who are Facebook friends of ours know that since April we have been going through a difficult situation in our family. Thanks for all of your support. We are looking for something positive to eventually come of it. Sometimes, though, it's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel when you have just barely entered it. We have often questioned why this has happened. We remain strong supporters of adoption from Ukraine, but we just never dreamed we would be going through this.

We lived out our adoption in this public blog, and we loved having you along on our journey. But this situation just isn't appropriate to talk about here.

You see this often in the adoption blogs and forums and it is worth repeating. Adoption is not for the faint of heart. As difficult as the process is, in many ways the hardest part begins when you get home. You did not have the benefit of teaching them your family values in their formative years. You were not able to protect them from the abuse that some of them suffered before you got them. Unfortunately, once the honeymoon period is over, life can get very difficult. Just go into your adoption with open eyes and a strong support system. You will very likely need it.

Farming in Ukraine

2011-04-08T10:34:00.004-05:00

Recently, quite by accident I websurfed into a blog of a Canadian family running a dairy farm in Ukraine. Though Nancy and I aren't farmers, we live in ag country here in South Dakota and both Nancy and my families have farming backgrounds. I have really enjoyed reading the posts from Garry & Teresa Verhoog. I added their blog to my Missionaries blogroll way down there on the bottom left. Nowadays with Facebook it seems harder to find good blogs.

The Verhoog's moved to Ukraine with their teenage boys to help the people in that village near Dnipropetrovsk. I think that is very cool.

To Forget About All Around Us

2011-04-03T15:35:00.007-05:00

When we were in Odessa, we sporadically attended a church that was attended by several young people that were either in Christian ministry, the missions field, or were planning to be. There was a street kid who used to show up at Sunday service once in a while. I remember one time he came and slept and snored through the whole service. Anyway, I met an American man there who ministered to street kids and offered to take me out to see what he does. Unfortunately, he worked during the night from 10pm to 4am and I just couldn't swing that in the midst of our adoption. I regret now that I never wrote down his contact information because I would have liked to have stayed in touch with him. Actually, now that I think about it, I do keep in touch with a missionary there. I think I will ask him if he is still attending there and see if I can get in touch.

The street kid problem in Ukrainian cities is a problem that most people in Ukraine ignore. I was asking that fellow why doesn't the government do something with these kids, provide for them somehow, and he told me that if they ignore it then it is not a problem. In other words, if they were to do something they would have to acknowledge that there is a problem. It is far easier and cheaper to look the other way. In the Odessa Holes video below, you can see the indignation that the woman has toward the kids and the American there.

There is an American pastor ministering to Odessa street kids, named Robert Gamble. He has a website called This Child Here. He produced the Odessa Holes video, below. Another part of Odessa Holes that I thought was interesting occurs at 4:40, where the narrator asks the kids why they are huffing glue:

- Tell me, boys, what for you do it?
What for we do it? To alleviate our souls.
We feel lightened in our hearts.
- And what it means feel lightened in the hearts?
To forget about all around us.

Recently, Michael Novotny published a photo essay of Odessa street kids. I will warn you, if images of children shooting up, huffing glue, and self-mutilating disturb you, then do not look at the images or watch the videos. You have been warned. Sin is not pretty, but this is where the rubber meets the road when you are in the missions field. God bless the people on the frontlines in ministry.

A New Father's Brief Time

2011-04-02T17:35:00.006-05:00

Back when I was in college, forever ago, I served as a co-chair for our MDA dance-a-thon. It was very rewarding to help raise money to look for a cure for muscular dystrophy.

It was with sadness that I ran across this story of a young dad named Matt Strzyzewski who passed away from the disease, leaving his wife and baby behind.

"Dear Landon,

By the time you're old enough to read this, you'll probably know all kinds of things about your dad. You've probably heard something about him every day of your life. You've seen the pictures of him holding you and the smiles - lots of his and then yours, too, once you were old enough to start smiling back."

A new father's brief time, recounted for his beloved son
Amy Rabideau Silvers
Milwaukee Journal Sentinel

Life's Most Expensive If-Only's

2011-03-31T17:10:00.007-05:00

I was listening to the radio in my car the other day and this little devotional came on by Ron Hutchcraft. As a parent of 3 teenagers, I found it right-on. Here is a quote from it:

Your son or daughter is feeling feelings now that really need your perspective...They're making choices, they're making friends, they're developing a sense of humor; trying to find out where God fits in everyday life. They need you there. There'll be many things more urgent but none more important. Everyone else will scream for your attention; they'll only whisper.

It is SO easy to get too busy and it's so hard to find a balance in life. I appreciated the reminder. I think you will, too.

You can listen here, or follow this link to read it.

There'll be many things more urgent but none more important. Everyone else will scream for your attention; they'll only whisper.

He Shows Up Where You Wouldn't Expect

2011-03-29T22:42:00.006-05:00

Recently, I completed a long awaited reorganizing of blog links that are not adopting families. I created several new sections way down on the left and one of them is called Ministries / Missionaries / Charities. Tonight, I added a new link in that section to the blog of Andrea Gariepy, a missionary in Ukraine orphanages.

I have recently been posting about how God can use us if only we would say "Here am I". Is the message getting through yet?

I want to post an excerpt from her Feb. newsletter:

"During the past six months I encountered Jesus on a regular basis through His children. I found Jesus in the eyes of the frail, 9-year-old girl lying in a crib who desperately longed for a simple loving touch. I found Jesus in the countless hugs and slobbery kisses of a sweet boy who, although he was rarely shown love, had boundless love to give away to others. I found Jesus in the beautiful face of a tiny baby girl, abandoned simply because she was born with one extra chromosome. I found Jesus in the shouts of a little girl who would run at top speed towards every set of visiting parents, catching a glimpse of what a Daddy is and deeply wanting one of her own.

I went to Ukraine to show love to ‘unwanted’ children and I thank God for the opportunities He gave me to do just that. I cradled abandoned babies in my arms, showered special needs toddlers with the affection they were so desperately missing and told intellectually handicapped teens that God loves them and thinks they’re perfect just the way they are. In the midst of it all I experienced God breaking, molding and transforming my own heart, giving me a love for these kids that is beyond what I can put into words."

Isn't that beautiful? She is encountering the King of the Universe in a little corner of Ukraine. Watch this short video clip then drop by her blog and offer her some encouragement.

Ёжик в тумане

2011-03-21T13:33:00.006-05:00

This is a post about a Russian and Ukrainian celebrity named Yozhik, or Little Hedgehog. Ёжик в тумане - Little Hedgehog in the Fog - is a short animated film from 1975 by the Russian Yuriy Norshteyn, based on a Russian folktale. Some have called the film the greatest animation of all time. That is quite an achievement.

I really like this story. It is beautiful and thought provoking. While western animators were producing violent drivel, the Russians, albeit Communist, were producing this visual poetry. Like any good poem, it is open to interpretation. These are some of the online comments people wrote about it:

"You need to watch closely to understand the meaning of the story. At the beginning, when the hedgehog is talking to himself, he's predicting what will happen when he gets to the bear's house. This means he has made the same journey enough times to know exactly what will happen. This time is different because he went out of his way, and because of that he lived a small adventure. He experienced fear, kindness and even had a near death experience, all of which has changed the way he sees life."

"I feel that the hedgehog represents all of us. She's going on a journey that she's gone on before, however in this instance there is fog. Her path is not completely clear. She experiences new things. She loses something important to her, only to find it again. She makes friends. She experiences the the fear of mortality before she can go one and continue living to meet the bear and eat her raspberry jam. It's a representation of life in story form. Like any good fairy tale."

"I think this is a story of a compassionate answer to absurdity. The hedgehog finds in the 'unfamiliar' (the absurd) the value of compassion, first in wondering if the horse will die, then from the dog who helps for no reason, and the fish who rescues him from despair. When he returns to his daily life he is now so changed that what once energized him to the point of forgetting fear, now holds no meaning and compassion for a horse means more then counting stars."

"Everyday he meets with the Bear. Very daily. It is so customary that he isnt aware of the owl stalking him. He is more worried about what he will do and say with the bear. Once he gets into the fog (the unfamiliar) he becomes more open-minded to his surroundings. He finds scary things and helpful things. Its kind of saying that 'This is the world. There are good things and bad things will happen, but don't be afraid.'"

"We are insignificant, uncomprehending little creatures in a world of inscrutable mysteries and unapproachable ideals. And we are left to others' goodness to get through our darkest hour. So be good."

"I always thought that barely discernible fish was immensely symbolic. That dark water rippling... gives me the chills every time."

"What is the point of life? The point is the amazing journey that anyone can experience in a seemingly normal setting. Just by the introduction of the fog into the hedgehog's environment, his world for him became mysterious, uncertain, even dangerous. Yet it was still the same place he called home, but through his eyes everything was different."

Like Little Hedgehog, I experienced the way that fog makes the familiar unfamiliar. On Jan. 21, 2009, I had flown into Odessa from Kyiv by myself at 9:00 at night, long after dark, in heavy fog (I blogged about that day here). I didn't want to pay the exhorbitant taxi prices at the airport and the buses had stopped coming to the airport for the day, so I thought that I would just walk to a differenct bus stop, about a mile away. It was very foggy and dark. After about 10 min. of walking I chickened out and went back and got a taxi. It was very creepy walking on dimly lit streets in heavy fog. I did not want to get lost.

Anyway, there is a monument to the Little Hedgehog in Kyiv. According to this story in the Kyiv Post, it was unveiled literally the day before my fog adventure in Odessa. If you are in Kyiv, or going there, make it a point to visit and get your picture taken with a celebrity that almost everyone knows from their childhood. It is next door to the St. Sophia monestary. Fly to 50°27'4.92"N, 30°30'50.15"E in Google Earth or your favorite mapping app to see where it is. If you use Google Earth, you can even view a 360° panorama of the square.

Watch the short film and see what you think. For more information you can read this Wikipedia article and the Internet Movie Database.

Where am I?

2011-02-03T08:21:00.003-06:00

The video in my previous post ended with "Here am I".

"Here am I."

"Here am I."

But where am I?

Being the hands and feet of Jesus to this world... making a difference... What more can be said? While we were complaining about the weather, others were pounding on the chests of infants in Africa trying to keep them alive. 147,000,000 orphans. 6,000 AIDS children orphaned daily. There are so many needs. Not just in Africa. Next door. Where am I?

Sometimes when I’m in the valley of the shadow of death, I DO fear. When I got the call that Harrington’s oxygen ran out, I was scared. As I drove to the hospital as fast as possible to pick him up, I was scared. Every time I bolted out of my car, I was terrified. And getting back in was even worse. As I knelt over Harrington and pounded on his chest, begging God to bring him back, I felt as though my own heart was stopping. Many times in the past month, I have asked God “Why? Why me? Why here?” and every time without fail, I hear “Because I chose you.” So with a heavy heart I continue… I continue the work that God has called me to because just that, HE has called me! Even when my heart is breaking...

Rene Bach

Isn't This Your Father's World?!!

2011-01-31T13:37:00.008-06:00

Please post this video to your blogs.

This past weekend I went on a little mission trip with Mark and his fellow sophomore class from Mitchell Christian School. We went to Sioux Falls to experience Urban Plunge. The purpose of UP is to expose participants to various Christian ministries that are making a difference in their communities. Mark's class needs to decide on a mission trip for next year and they are trying to discern where they should go and what they should do. We visited six organizations and 2 churches (a biker church and an African-American church) over 3 days.

Saturday night, we watched this powerful video, called A Thousand Questions. It encourages us to get involved to make a difference for Christ in our world. In the adoption world, we often talk about the Starfish story. But really, it applies to any of the needs around us. By ourselves, there is not much we can do. But together, we can make a real difference.

When our adopted kids came into our home, we expected them to participate in the chores, and to clean up after themselves. Likewise, our heavenly Father expects us to do His chores and to clean up the messes we have made of His place. So we better get busy helping to clean up!

By the way, there is a blog that I look at once in awhile called Kisses from Katie. She is a young lady making a difference that you may be inspired by.

Mission Trips Affect You

2010-11-06T21:25:00.005-05:00

Over the years I have been a church youth group volunteer and have been to Mexico several times with teenagers. I think these trips are great because they give our teens a different perspective on the world. This is always true: We go places intending to make a difference, but we often find that the biggest difference happens within us. I encourage you to get involved with your church with short-term missions. Yes, it may cost you some vacation time, but what an experience.

From time to time I come across blogs of missions teams that go to Ukraine, both adult groups and youth. I don't really have a blog list for them because they come and go so quickly, plus they're kind of hard to find. Here's a video of some youth that went to Ukraine in 2004. I guarantee you they came home changed. About a week ago, Valya and I watched it and we wept together.

Hope Is Fading - Orphan Sunday

2010-10-28T11:59:00.003-05:00

Back when I was in Odessa, I wrote a post called Greener Pastures, which was about orphans' Hope. That day, the reality of the kids left behind hit me hard. I was so sad for them.

I remember one time at Sergey's orphanage... I had asked him if there were a lot of classmates that had been adopted... And he told me that he was the 19th one. I was surprised that he knew exactly how many there were. That told me that these kids really were paying attention - moreso than I expected.

Here is a video called Hope Is Fading, part of the promotion for Orphan Sunday on Nov. 7. The line in here that really kills me is when she looks in the mirror and says, "Today is the day - the family is coming to choose. I hope I look pretty enough." As if that should have anything to do with it. This poor ragamuffin has no idea how priceless she is. I hate this idea that picking out a child is like selecting a puppy at the pet store. It just isn't right.

Hope is Fading – Orphan Sunday from Allan Rosenow on Vimeo.

Where's Molly?

2010-10-21T23:45:00.009-05:00

"Imagine playing with your little sister one day and the next being told she didn't exist."

Yesterday, our local news ran a story about an Oregan man named Jeff Daley, who gave a presentation at Augustana College about his little sister who had been institutionalized when they were young. 50 years later, he searched for her and found her.

"Three days shy of her third birthday, Daly's parents sent his younger sister, Molly, to an institution."

"He grew up knowing that any mention of his sister meant punishment. His family moved to California and life continued as if nothing had happened. But what happened to Molly haunted him."

He has produced a documentary DVD. You can read more about them on his official website.

The story kind of resonated with me because of what we hear about institutions in Ukraine and other European countries, and yet, this happened in America. You may find this moving.

Summer Update

2010-10-10T18:40:00.121-05:00

Here's the latest update from our household. Sorry it's a long one, I really do need to post more often.

June is a special time for dads. We celebrated our 2nd Father's Day together as a new family. I love my kids. I get lots of affection from all three of them.

Mark got his first "real" parttime job this summer, working for an employer. Here he is with his first paycheck. We have told Mark and Valya that now that they are 16 they will be working fulltime next summer.

Sergey loves the New York Yankees first, baseball second. The last two summers he has played on a youth rec league. This year his team, the Yankees, naturally, took first place in the city tournament. This is a picture of last year's and this year's team photos. Next year he will be too old for this league. His only option is a traveling team that plays all summer. It requires tryouts. We don't know yet if that's the right thing for us. It would be a very large commitment and expense if he were to make the team.

Nancy has a sister who has also adopted two children. Here Sergey is with one of his little cousins.

Sergey and mom Nancy.

While the boys would be content playing video games much of the time, Valya likes to spend her time with friends, in person or on Facebook.

We went to the Black Hills this summer to visit my mom. Though she lives in California, she stays at her cabin several times a year.

We also spent some time touring Spearfish Canyon.

I like this picture because Sergey is helping Valya. They haven't always gotten along well but seem to be now.

In July, Mark and I went on a boy scout backpacking trip to the Shoshone National Forest in northwest Wyoming. The scenery was spectacular.

Heading out.

Amelia Earhart had planned to retire to this area, near the mining town of Kerwin. She hired workers to build a home for her here. They had started on it, but then she never came back from her trip and the work was abandoned. In this picture, we are walking past the ruins of the unfinished cabin.

This area has been decimated by pine beetles. Much of the pine forest is nothing but dead trees.

One of our daily camps. You can see yellow electric fence around the tents. This is bear country. A couple of weeks after we got back, a bear attacked some tents not far from here and and killed one. In some of these pictures you can see the bear spray canisters we wore in case we met a bear. Our guide also had a rifle along.

From this vantage point we could see northwest toward Cody, WY. The distant mountains in the upper left are about 60 miles away, and those farthest gray ones in the center are about 100 miles away.

Our guide points out where he likes to go elk hunting.

The end of a memorable time together.

We celebrated Valya's 16th birthday in August. She had a pool party with her friends. We also brought a cake to school so that she could share it with her classmates, and then we had a private family time at home later.

Every Labor Day weekend, there is a huge Christian music festival called Lifelight near hear. It is a 3-day event with about 200,000 people entering the gates during that time.

Here, Valya picks out a girl to sponsor with Food for the Hungry. She looked for someone exactly her age.

Lifelight is a good place to meet up with friends. This is a place you can go to and not see your kids the rest of the day. Thanks goodness for cell phones. It would be impossible to find people otherwise.

Some of the friends we like to meet up with are the Wolff family. Here Valya poses with Anya and Nastya. They lived in the same orphanage as our son Sergey, but they are a little older than him. Nancy and I swapped stories and advice with their parents about our post-adoption family life.

When Valya went to Bible camp this summer, there was a counselor there that gave a concert, named Adam Sieff. He has recorded a rap CD called Incarnation Invasion and was at Lifelight this year with F.O.G. Flame On Gospel.

For almost a year I have been wanting to share this family on our blog. We bumped into our friends Joel and Gloria at Lifelight. They are church friends of ours and adopted domestically. They were working on their homestudy when we were. I would ask Joel, So, did you get your questions finished (like 50 or a 100 for the HS). And he'd say Nope not yet! He was kind of like me, he did not enjoy that part. (Nancy, on the other hand, loves probing questions. But me, not too much) We went to Ukraine and back before they were able to adopt their little one. Their profile was in an album and they needed to wait for a birthmom to select them. So belated congratulations to you guys!

Our tradition is to take a fun trip right before school starts. Usually we go to an amusement park somewhere, but this year the kids wanted to go to the Omaha zoo (I grew up watching Mutal of Omaha's Wild Kingdom, did you?). It is an awesome zoo. Everyone enjoyed it. As it turns out, one day isn't enough time to see it all. We want to go back.

School started in August. Mark is in 10th grade, Valya is in 8th, and Sergey is in 7th. You can tell from the obligatory First Day of School Picture that they are thrilled to be there again.

Valya at PE class. She can't waste an opportunity to hug a friend. The baseball mitt she is wearing was Nancy's dad's. He passed away in 2000.

Fall ushers in our busy time as a family. For example, here is a picture of our September calendar. Each of the kids has their own color code. They are all in a different Fall sport, so we find ourselves going in many different directions all week. Such is life with teenagers. This is just another season in our lives and someday, not too far away, this will all be a memory.

Mark is running Cross Country again this year. He enjoys it and it helps get him in shape for basketball season.

Valya watches Mark approach the finish line.

Valya is playing JV volleyball this year. She really enjoys it. Our team doesn't have the best win-loss record, but they do have the best socks! The varsity team has them, too. She says that she can't decide if she wants to play volleyball or soccer next year. She is #10 in these photos.

Probably the best thing about the summer was the arrival of two special teenagers from Ukraine. Marat was one of Sergey's best friends at Orphanage #4 in Odessa, and we had spent some time with him while we were there adopting Sergey. He has an older sister, Alina, whom I had gotten to know a little because she had been one of Sergey's and Marat's playroom supervisors after their primary supervisor went on maternity leave. When we got back home, we advocated for these two, and another Mitchell family actually went over there and adopted them. I never EVER in a million years would have expected that. They arrived in July, while Mark and I were in Wyoming, so I wasn't able to meet them at the airport. I also had the camera with me so we have no pictures of their arrival. Their adoption story is an amazing one. The family got to the US Embassy in Kyiv to turn in advance papers for Alina 53 hours before her 18th birthday. Literally, in the nick if time. They had no idea that a family was coming for them and to hear the story of their first meeting after she had given up hope of being adopted was just... it was a miracle.

Marat and Alina at the school. Marat is in Sergey's 7th grade class, and Alina is enrolled in 9th.

Our friend M from Odessa came to Mitchell to visit. We always enjoy it when she comes to visit. We stayed with M while we were adopting Valya and Sergey. We can't repay her enough. She gave a presentation to our high school during chapel about life in Ukraine, the orphans there, and following God's call on our lives.

Mark also recently celebrated his 16th birthday. He wanted to do the cosmic bowling thing with all of the bright lights and loud music and a late pizza party. At age 15 he had gotten a restricted driver's license, which prohibited him from driving after 10 PM. So when he drove to the bowling alley, he wasn't able to legally drive home until midnight since at 16 he could drive anytime. I thought it was kind of funny that there was a 2 hr. window there when he couldn't drive home.

On his actual birthday, we just had a quiet time of opening cards, then went out to eat.

Mark's birthday was also the start of homecoming week for our school. He needed to go to a friend's house for their sophomore class's skit practice. So that is where we had his cake.

Being in 7th grade now made Sergey eligible for high school soccer. He played JV, while Marat played JV and varsity. Two years ago, on a visit to Sergey's orphanage, I blogged about Marat being the fastest runner. Sergey wasn't bothered by the fact that Marat got to play varsity because he also recognizes his ability, having told me about him several times before.

Sergey in action.

Marat in action.

This picture of Marat would otherwise be uninteresting but I wanted to include it because it reminds me of another one that I posted of him one time. After 2 years, I can finally reveal that the boy in the picture walking on the soccer field at the orphanage was, in fact, Marat. That particular day we were visiting, the orphanage was overcast and seemed particularly depressing. What a contrast having Marat here now.

Mom Nancy watching a game.

Here are some pictures of Sergey (#11) and Marat (#12) playing together.

Alina and Valya watch their brothers play.

M was able to see one of their games. Here she is with the Mitchell Ukies.

Every day during homecoming week was a different theme. Here Valya, an 8th grader, is wearing one of Nancy's 8th grade dresses. Sergey dressed as Michael Jackson.

Mark's sophomore class had a food booth fundraiser at the homecoming soccer game. At our school, the junior class always goes on a short-term mission trip to a foreign country during Spring Break. They get to decide where they want to go. But they are also responsible for raising the funds that they need. I don't know what they will decide, but I think Haiti would be an excellent choice.

We first moved to Mitchell when Mark was a baby. Our neighbors across the street gave birth to a baby girl. As the kids got older, she was one of Mark's playmates until we moved to a different neighborhood. But she has been a classmate of Mark's since preschool. She is the beautiful blond girl in this picture, working in the food booth (In front of Nancy, the beautiful brunette!). I include it because it causes me to marvel about how fast time is slipping by. Wasn't it just last week that we had Leah and Mark in the back seat giggling? No, I guess that was 12 years ago.

Sergey's History class was studying Egypt and he was assigned a project to make a model of the pyramids. I helped him with that. It's good that Sergey has a dad to help him with stuff like this. I did this same project 3 years ago with Mark.

Recently, we went to a corn maze as a family. Our two Ukies had never been in one before. They're kind of fun. They're even open after dark, but that would be really hard to get through.

I don't know if you've been following the Weber adoption. All along they had been hoping to adopt both a boy and a girl from Ukraine, having that in their homestudy. When they got there, they got the runaround from the officials that there were NO available girls in that whole oblast. Um, right. While at summer camp, they met and fell in love with a little girl. They came home during the waiting period for their son while their (and our) facilitator tried to arrange another appointment with the SDA for this girl. He was successful and they were able to get the referral, but in the meantime, the girl had been getting told lies about Americans and had decided that she didn't want to be adopted after they went back to get her. I offered to have Valya write a letter to her to try to reassure her to not be afraid to come to America. According to Valya, she wrote the words with Ukrainian letters but the words would sound Russian when they were read to her. Kind of mysterious to me how that works. Anyway, I scanned the letter and emailed it to Erick, and within hours after Valya wrote it, it had beem read to her. They said it helped. As of this writing, they are waiting for a court date for her. Theirs is truly a marathon adoption.

We have a starfish magnet on our refrigerator, right next to our broken Ukraine magnet. It is a reminder to us of our own two starfish, and all of the other starfish in the world waiting for a family. Will you save a starfish? Or are you too overwhelmed with the magnitude of the world's orphan problem and do nothing?

Immigrant TB Testing

2010-10-10T14:26:00.004-05:00

Yesterday, some friends of ours that adopted from Ukraine and are medical doctors, passed on some info to us that may be of value to those of you who also have adopted from Ukraine. We will be passing it on to our family doctor to see what he thinks about it. You can see this link for more info.

"[I] recently became aware of some new medical information that has affected my girls and I wanted to pass it on. I figured if it was new to me (I am suppose to know this stuff) then maybe you didn't know it either. Our children received a vaccine in Ukraine for Tb called BCG. It was suppose to protect them from Tb. It is not a good vaccine and doesn't work very well. That is why the US doesn't use it. My girls actually received it more than once. The real problem with the vaccine is that it turns the usual skin test (ppd) that we use here to test to see if someone has been exposed to Tb, useless. It has widely been assumed (until very recently ) that if you had BCG you should not even do a ppd skin test because it would always be positive and that would be a false positive and mean nothing. So the only way to test for Tb was to do a chest xray and that would show tif you had active Tb. There was no way to tell if you had just been exposed. So all of our children were required to have chest xrays before we left Ukraine to come to the US. Well, recently for some very strange reasons, I found out that those guidelines have changed. I am sending you a very good article that outlines the changes that you can print and bring to your doctors. The guidelines say that you should do a ppd and if it is positive then you should do a special Q. Gold blood test. If that is positive then the child should be treated for one year with a medicine called INH to prevent conversion in the future to active Tb. You see, many of our children, despite the vaccine have been exposed to Tb in Ukraine but have not yet developed active Tb. This is the stage when they are healthy and the Tb can be stopped from ever developing into active disease. The INH is not without risk but when they are young the risks are much smaller than when they are older. Also, the medicine must be taken regularly for one year to be affective and that is more likely to happen when they are still living in our homes under our care than when they are out on their own some day. Also, after talking to the head of Infection Disease at the Univ. of Iowa and at the Center of Disease Control, Atlanta they believe it should be done within 5 years of arriving to the US for best benefit. Only one of my daughters is positive by the blood test. So it doesn't mean that your children are positive, only that it is a possibility. It doesn't mean that they are sick. Just that they have a chance of becoming sick in the future (maybe many many years from now) but that it can be prevented if they are treated now. The state health department pays and provides the medicine. My daughter did need to have one more chest xray to prove that she still had no active disease before we could begin the treatment. If they had found any disease then they would have treated her with two medicines instead of only one. After the treatment no further treatment is ever needed again. I hope this helps. I was still working under the old model and so was our doctor. Pass this on to anyone that you think could benefit."

Hi Again

2010-10-04T22:19:00.009-05:00

Well I feel like a stranger here! I'm on the blog regularly to update the blogrolls but it seems like you never hear from me anymore. It's a shame because there really is stuff going on. I have finished several projects at home and at work and I really would like to get back into the blogging thing. The kids have changed a lot in the last year and half and I know that several of you would like updates.

It's not that I don't like to blog. It's just different now. The kids are all teenagers and computer savvy, sort of, with their own Facebook accounts and email addresses, and I think even shortcuts to the blog on their favorites. So as you can imagine we have to be sensitive to what is said, right?

I guess these days everyone uses FB to communicate day-to-day things. I see the blog as more of a general medium. In my opinion, blogs are superior for getting information out there, and are great for documenting life. Where would the adoption commununity be if there were only FB and email? I know I learned a lot about Ukraine and adoption through all the blogs out there and I want to help others by publicizing as many Ukraine adoption blogs as I can. Sometimes I go back and reread posts from our time over there and I still get tears in my eyes reliving the experience and reading the comments that our bloggy friends left for us. If we had used FB that stuff would be long gone.

Ukraine adoptions never lack for drama. Since we have been there, there have been volcanoes, epidemics and quarantines, a new Ukrainian president, government scandals and upheaval, war in Georgia, natural gas disputes, and the normal adoption problems. While every adoption is different, there is a surprising amount of problems they have in common. Birth certificate issues, family members that show up and interfere, property issues, kids that change their minds, bad referrals, running out of money, excessive delays, officials on long vacations, bad weather, city councils getting in the way, people wanting "gifts" to merely do their job, uncooperative directors, behavior issues of the kids, job crises, health problems, and more. It's best for everyone to go into this with eyes open.

I don't know how anyone can adopt from Ukraine without a faith in God. He is, after all, an everpresent help in a time of need:

¹ God is our refuge and strength,
         A very present help in trouble.
² Therefore we will not fear,
         Even though the earth be removed,
         And though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea;

(Psalm 46:1-2, New King James Version)

It's very comforting to have the King of the Universe with you when you're over there. He's like a... Superhero! Enjoy this video from Hillsong Kyiv, Иисус Мой Супергерой (Jesus My Superhero). I showed this to Valya once and she knew all of the motions. Not sure where she learned them. Must have been at the orphanage sometime. Listen for Spiderman, Superman, and Batman.

Let's stay in touch.

-- Alan

Our Friends the Weber's are in Ukraine

2010-07-24T12:18:00.005-05:00

While we were in Ukraine adopting Valya and Sergey, another South Dakota family got to know us through our blog and met us at the Sioux Falls airport at our homecoming on Feb. 15, 2009. They are Erick and Joni Weber and they live about a 1-1/2 hour drive from us. In this picture, you can see me meeting Joni for the first time, with Erick and their son Misha looking on. Misha was adopted from Ukraine in Spring of 2008.

We talked by phone and emailed alot as they worked through their paperwork for their next adoptions, and now they are in Ukraine. You can follow their journey on their blog here. How exciting!

More Than Blogrolls

2010-07-03T20:35:00.007-05:00

I know that most people come to our blog for our Ukraine adoption blogrolls (485 links right now), but did you know that there are other links way, way, way down there on the bottom left? Some may be of interest to you. I recently found and added a very helpful international adoption website with 931 adoption articles. The website is called International Adoption Articles Directory. Check it out.

Spring Update

2010-06-14T12:33:00.040-05:00

Hi everyone. Checking in here quickly with a family update. We have our ups and downs but overall things are good. The school year flew by and the kids are enjoying summer vacation so far. Here are some pictures.

On Memorial Day, I took a solo trip to visit where some of my relatives were from. These pictures are of Woonsocket, SD. My Grandma lived here after Grampa died. Every summer we would drive out from Long Beach CA to this little town on the prairie. Back in the early 1970's, I remember swimming in this lake with my cousins from Washington state who would also travel here to visit. The Sunfish used to come up to us and "kiss" our legs as we would wade and swim. So many memories in this little town. Now it's like another lifetime.

This is a cemetery out in the country in rural Jerauld county, where several of my relatives are buried. There used to be a Lutheran church here, where my mother was pianist when she was in high school. Unfortunately, it was torn down in the 1960's.

We also visited the cemetery where Nancy's parents are buried. Here, Valya is standing at their grave. It was their inheritance money that allowed us to go to Ukraine to adopt Valya and Sergey.

Here, the kids pose in the northeast part of the state, overlooking the Red River Valley of North Dakota.

We like being on the water. Here the kids are tubing, and a picture of Nancy.

We have had a ridiculous amount of rain this Spring. 8" of rain just this week. Everything is very green, as you can see in our backyard.

The kids are doing some chores. Here, Sergey mows at his uncle's, and Valya and some neighbor girls plant flowers around our mailbox.

Valya has been attending the June session of summer school to get more math practice. She found a baby cottontail rabbit at the school and brought him home. Sergey will not be in summer school this year, but he has started private tutoring for phonics.

Here, Sergey and Valya pose with some of their teachers from the last school year.

As a 9th grader, Mark played JV basketball. Meanwhile, in the stands, Sergey gets pestered by little girls.

At the school's athletic banquet, Mark gets a hug from his cross country coach, and Valya is recognized for participating in volleyball.

Sergey loves baseball, and is playing for his favorite team, the Mitchell Yankees. Well, actually the New York Yankees are his favorite team.

Valya took a babysitting course at the hospital so she can babysit. Here, she poses with some sisters she watched for an afternoon (on Valentine's day). She enjoys little kids. Here she is having lemonade and playing Uno with some neighbor kids.

Valya enjoying a view of Rapid City, SD.

Valya enjoying her cousin's prom dress.

We had intended to go to a Ukrainian church for Easter in the Minneapolis metro area, but didn't realize it started at Midnight, so we missed it. Women need to wear a head covering so Valya was ready.

Valya likes this picture. She says, Why do Americans always want to see your teeth when you take a picture? The kids' Ukrainian passport photos were very stoic. The government lady taking the pictures curtly told them not to smile.

Sergey likes to fish. Here, he was getting some tips at a youth fishing derby at Cabela's in Mitchell.

Here are some family pictures. Mark and Sergey horsing around, playing Rock Band, enjoying hotdogs and smores over a campfire, and a family picnic in the basement on movie night.

One Year Anniversary

2010-02-16T22:43:00.067-06:00

I can't believe it but Feb. 15 was our first anniversary of arriving home with Valya and Sergey. Thanks to those who have emailed us and remembered our anniversary. I haven't updated you on how things are going since last Fall. It's going well. We have the literal daily drama of three teenagers in the house. But probably not more than any other typical American household with three teens.

Teens can be so funny. The smallest thing can be a crisis or a flash point for some kind of blowup. All three of them are testing their wings and pushing limits (and out patience sometimes). It can be exhausting. It's been said that God lets you go through this so that you'll be ready to push them out of the nest when the time comes. Well some days we're ready now!

The past year has brought incredibly low times, to the point where we questioned if we ever should have adopted. Defiance can be absolutely frustrating. Nothing makes my blood boil like a 14 year old who looks straight at me and says "No" or "I'm not going to do that" in response to something I've asked. But thankfully we're seeing less of that as time goes on.

We have had incredibly high times as well. I think I've gotten a thousand kisses and hugs from Valya over the last year. Sergey is affectionate as well. The other night he had a nightmare and crawled into bed with Nancy and me, shaking like a leaf. I was glad we could be there for him. There would have been no one for him at the orphanage.

I'll say more with pictures.

We got Sergey into Boy Scouts right away. In fact, he went along on a Boy Scout campout during the summer of 2008 when he had hosted him for a couple of weeks. Mark has been involved in Scouts from the beginning, Tiger Scouts in 1st grade. Mark has been kind of dawdling in his progress though and Sergey thinks he can make Eagle before him! I am the Scoutmaster of Troop 75 and I get to give them their awards.

Last Fall, we had a family Christmas get-together with Nancy's three sisters and their families at the farm. It's good for our new kids to be a part of an extended family. Since we mostly live far apart, they enjoy seeing their cousins once in a while. Our day was spent visiting, eating, doing crafts, basketball, kickball, paintball, eating, trampoline, reading the Christmas story from the Bible, opening gifts, and eating. We even managed to get a picture with everyone in it. Nancy's parents would have been pleased. It was Nancy's inheritance money that allowed us to go to Ukraine and adopt our kids.

Valya loves to climb trees. She says that trees are her best friends. When she was at the orphanage she says that she used to jump from tree to tree. One time a branch broke and cut her face. She says she had a tree that everyone knew was "hers" and she would push anyone out that climbed in it. One time she pushed a boy off and he fell out and broke his leg. Such a sweet princess. The countryside where Nancy grew up is very much like the countryside in Ukraine where Valya is from. If you didn't know any different you could easily mistake one for the other.

If you follow news in Ukraine, you know that they had bad winter weather this year. Recently the news was saying that all states except Hawaii have snow on the ground right now. Our winter so far in Mitchell is on track for being in the top-10 of the snowiest. In these pictures Sergey and Valya are helping to clear snow. You know Valya is Ukrainian when you see her shoveling snow in high heels!

I would like to say that we had a good Thanksgiving meal together, and I guess in the end, we did. But this was one of those times when we battled with teenagers. It was a time of broken expectations for Nancy and I. We were expecting a special time together but it was not all that rewarding. I had requested that the boys wear a button-down shirt to the table, since it was not just any meal, but Thanksgiving. You would think that I had made the most demanding impossible request ever. First it was the shirt itself, then it was that it had to be actually buttoned, and then that it needed to be tucked in. Brother. We had long drawn out arguments beforehand and very poor attitudes during the meal. And then our adopted kids disliked almost everything we prepared. It was very disappointing. One thing that did go OK was that we had also asked everyone to write 5 things to share about everyone else in the family that they were thankful for. I was pleased that they actually did it and had put some thought into it. We have a couple of pictures from before the meal when we were carving the turkey, but it was impossible to take one around the table as the boys were in a bad mood.

We made gingerbread bears during the Christmas season. Teenagers have their own way of doing things. We got one-eyed cyclops, pirates, bleeding, and other unusual cookies.

In September, I had posted about how our black cat, Bootsie, had passed away. In December we had to give away our other cat, Patches, because Valya seemed to be allergic to cats. Patches was always Mark's cat, the one that he would usually be with when he was younger. This picture was the last one with Mark as we were about to take him to his new home. The cat I mean.

In December, Sergey got to do something that he had always wanted to do but was never able. We took him skiing for the first time. He enjoyed it and would like to do more of it.

The kids helped with some of the Christmas decorating. There is a story behind most of our tree ornaments. Here Sergey is looking at some.

Our Ukies are making good progress in school. Valya is in 7th grade, while Sergey is in 6th grade. We are working hard at increasing their English and reading skills. Here, Valya is working on a science experiment with sand, gravel, and soil suspended in water.

All of the kids had to sing in their school's Christmas concert. It is definitely not their favorite thing to do.

While the kids were somewhat dressed up for the concert, we took a family picture that we included in all of our Christmas cards we sent out.

I played my classical guitar at our church's Christmas program. Here I am practicing before we left for church, and Valya posed in front of the tree.

We didn't put any presents under the Christmas tree until Christmas eve. We put a few under earlier but they were getting too much attention from our Ukies so we changed our mind. This is what our tree looked like on Christmas morning. Last year at this time they had no presents at all.

Our Ukies were up bright and early to open presents. Mark was more interested in sleeping.

Mark the goof. He wrapped up Sergey's iTunes card with tape, and in the 2nd picture Sergey is about to get beaned.

We had a pretty low-key New Year's Eve, with a few of Mark's friends over. Valya giving her brother a big hug.

Valya always livens up the place.

We will celebrate our Gotcha Day every year on Jan. 19, the day that we had court in Odessa and the judge ruled that we could have the kids. Many people choose Gotcha Day as the day they take their kids from the orphanage. We didn't take them out at the same time so court day works better for us. Gotcha Day was a school day for us, but we were able to prepare a borsch meal. It was delicious.

In January, we had to say goodbye to our friends, the Tolly family. They adopted their two Ukrainian daughters, Lena and Tanya, from the Andreyevo orphanage. It was on that very computer in these pictures in the summer of 2007 where Jon and Janell showed us pictures from their trip. They were the ones who suggested Valya as a possibility for us to adopt. And through other people they introduced us to, we were able to learn about and adopt Sergey. So we have a lot to thank them for. They have moved to the Minneapolis area where Jon has joined the pastoral staff at Friendship Church.

One day, I found this note on our refrigerator. It was from Valya, and it said, "I love my family except my Dad". She is quite a teaser. Actually, both of our new kids are very affectionate and often let us know how glad they are to be a part of our family.

Alone at Christmas

2009-12-22T13:00:00.004-06:00

It's almost Christmas and I have been thinking back to the orphans in Ukraine that I spent time with last winter. When we were at Orphanage #4 in Odessa I remember that my first reaction to the place was one of loneliness and bleakness. In fact, I posted about it at the time. Of course, there are kids all around but it always seemed lonely to me.

I put together a little video here with some pictures from Ukraine. I start with some of the familiar landmarks in Kyiv, such as the SDA, Independence Square, and St. Sophia and St. Michael's monastaries. From there, we go to Odessa by the Black Sea, and Orphanage #4 where Sergey lived, and finally, Andreyevo-Ivanivka, where Valya lived.

The thing I wanted to mostly show was some of the kids I met, all older, some of which will be kicked out of their orphanages about a year and a half from now. Most of you reading this have no interest in adopting an older child, and I understand. But there really are some great older kids that would love to have a family.

There's an estimate that there are about 147,000,000 orphans in the world. That's a lot of kids; it's even overwhelming. But we can help, one family at a time.

Our friends, the Nasekos family, whom we met while we were in Odessa, posted recently about From Whom? Please take a look at it.

If all of you reading this committed today to adopt an older child, you would have them with you next Christmas. What a gift that would be for them, and for you...

Music Credit
Alone by Matthew Mayer from his CD Crossing the Bridge
He's from South Dakota.

Christmas Shoeboxes

2009-12-11T00:24:00.000-06:00

Our family has put together Christmas shoeboxes for years. Samaritan's Purse has a ministry called Operation Christmas Child that distributes these donated shoebox gifts to children all over the world.

We were surprised to learn that our two Ukies were also recipients of these boxes. We expect the gifts to be sent overseas but I never expected to meet anyone who had received one. And here our own children had received some over the years.

This year we put two of them together, one each for a boy and a girl, and we had Valya and Sergey select the items to put in them. They remembered the things they had liked. For example, Valya's had some underwear, a little bit of makeup, jewelry, a stuffed animal and a doll. She also included a picture of herself and a letter. Sergey's had a variety of toys, personal care items, and some clothes. We paid an online donation and we got barcoded labels so now we will be able to track where our two boxes go in the world.

Whoever gets these boxes is in for a treat. Our boxes are actually boot sized and packed with things that our kids knew that they would like, from experience.

Valya poses with her box. She included a picture of herself and a note.

We Left One Year Ago Today, Nine Months Home

2009-11-21T09:24:00.009-06:00

I don't have to tell you how time flies, you already know that, of course. One year ago today we left for our first adoption trip, the first of two. 2½ months later our adoptions were complete. It seems like yesterday. Our SDA appointment was on Thanksgiving Day 2008. We spent it in the food court at the underground mall called Globus, in Independence Square in Kyiv. Amazing.

Last Sunday, the 15th, also marked 9 months home with our Ukies. On Friday the 13th I was thinking back to the Friday the 13th in February this year, the day we completely finished our tasks in Ukraine. We flew home the next day. Also amazing.

Nobody leaves expecting their adoptions to have problems or to take a long time. But sometimes you get blindsided over there and run into issues you never expected. Well, you do what you have to.

I suppose with time my feelings for Ukraine and our adoption trips will fade, but right now they are still very strong. With the help of our blog and our pictures (we have 3,104 of them!), I still remember everything like it was yesterday.

I want to give a brief update of how our family is doing lately. If I had to summarize, I would say we are taking the bad with the good. While things are usually good, we have had incredibly frustrating times as well. Not totally unexpected but still frustrating as parents. This also isn't necessarily because 2 of our 3 kids recently came from orphanages, but because we now have three teenagers whose total age range spans only 13 months.

Our Ukrainian kids are very dramatic. If something crosses Valya the wrong way she will stomp off to her room and slam the door. It doesn't take her long to get over it though and she often will be out in 5 minutes or so. Sergey is more moody. He is intensely jealous of Valya. We are learning to be more balanced in the attention we give to the children, but on any given day, who knows. We cannot leave the two of them alone. Ever. Because they will fight, or at least be mean to each other. While it appears that Valya is trying to be more conciliatory toward Sergey, the same cannot be said yet of him toward her. He is very wounded and he usually takes it out on her. Not to say that she wasn't guilty after we first arrived, but it seems she is moving beyond that. Mark is, I think, finally adjusting to the new kids. He has always been quiet, and still is, but he doesn't seem to react as adversely as he used to when they are wild or annoying. He gets embarrassed easily and angry when he sees them do immature things in public, like when we are around people at church or at their school.

But, that being said, it is usually good. Our Ukies each have 7 years of orphanage that needs to be purged from their systems. Maybe it will take 7 years. I don't know. We are in this for the long haul.

You all want to see pictures, so here's quite a few.

This summer, Sergey and I attended an airshow in Sioux Falls where we saw the Blue Angels. Sergey had a lot of fun and really enjoyed the airplane displays and aerobatics.

B-1 bombers are enormous. You can't appreciate it unless you are standing underneath one.

All three of our kids had sports seasons that just ended. Mark was in cross country, Valya was in volleyball, and Sergey was in basketball.

One of Mark's cross country meets was on his birthday. Here the team is singing Happy Birthday to him, and praying before returning home. The team always prays after a meet.

This is the first time that Sergey has been in an organized sport. Besides new basketball skills, he had to learn things like teamwork, commitment, and sportsmanship. In the third picture, he makes a pretty decent screen. He has come quite a ways since playing basketball with me at his orphanage last December.

Valya loved volleyball, though she says that she would rather play soccer next Fall. Time will tell.

I wanted to include this picture because the girl that Valya's arm is around, her family is adopting from Ukraine soon. Can't say much about it now but it is very exciting. Nancy and I met with her parents a while back, and they told us, You know what sealed it for us? When we saw Nancy at the school for registration. Nancy, Valya, and Sergey were at the school before it started to register for classes and they had to wait in long lines. While waiting, the kids where hanging out, hanging on Nancy and just being affectionate. The family noticed that and made the final decision to adopt up to five older kids from Ukraine.

Valya and some teammates watch the varsity team play. Interesting tidbit I can share with you about Valya. I had no idea before but she is only half-blooded Ukrainian. Her mother was French and her family immigrated somehow to Ukraine. She remembers her mother speaking French in her home and still remembers a few French words. Interestingly, our last name is also French. Prêtre is French for priest. Curious about G-FY-G? Glorify God.

This summer, the kids had summer school in the morning, home by 12:00. Here they are playing a card game after school.

Here we are playing Dutch Blitz. Don't play it as much as I expected we would. Everyone has their own thing going on usually. The other night Valya and I were playing Dominoes, the first time since we were in Odessa. I commented to her that the last time we played this game, we weren't able to talk together. She remembered.

We were thrilled to have our friend M stop by last summer. She is a volunteer at Sergey's orphanage and she let us stay with her in Odessa last December while we were on our first adoption trip.

M has sat on the floor at Orphanage #4 countless times playing games with the children, like in the third picture below. It was strange in a way having her in our home doing it.

In anticipation of M coming to visit, our church's VBS week designated their offerings for her. Sergey was a VBS helper and is showing here that they exceeded their offering goal for her.

Kayla was a senior at Mitchell Christian and was a tutor for Valya after she arrived. She was interested in helping because she wants to work as a translator some day. Her dad is one of the teachers at the school and has been on several missions trips to Russia, and can speak it some. He was one of the few people who could speak to her when we got back because Valya couldn't speak any English then.

Valya is quite the drama queen. When she becomes really fluent in English I imagine she will want to get involved in drama in high school.

She is a country girl. When she was a young girl, before the orphanage, she lived on a farm with animals. Sergey, on the other hand, loves the city. I wouldn't be surprised if he moves to New York City when he finishes school. He loves the Yankees and he says he loves NYC. We'll see. He was thrilled when the Yankees won the World Series this year. We had let him stay up later than usual on school nights so he could watch the games.

Nancy is also a country girl, through and through. Me not so much.

Valya, Sergey, and I took a trip to the Black Hills this Fall to see my mother and stepfather. She has a cabin that she visits several times a year. Nancy and Mark stayed in Mitchell because he had a cross country meet. The kids enjoyed watching the little critters like squirrels and chipmunks. One interesting thing, I don't know if it's true of all Ukrainians or just our kids, is that all animals they refer to as "she". Like the squirrel below, we would probably say It is cute, or He is cute, but both of our Ukies would say She is cute. Sergey set up a trap with a bird feed scoop, put bait in it, and patiently waited for a chipmunk to go under it. When one finally did, he pulled the string and trapped it. I told him he shouldn't handle it because it might bite him. Well he didn't listen to me. It did.

A short walk from grandma's cabin in the Black Hills is the McVey Wildlife Management Area. It is very beautiful.

While in the area we stopped at Mt. Rushmore. Valya had never been there before. We had taken Sergey there when we hosted him in August 2008.

We spent an afternoon at the historic Evans Plunge pool in Hot Springs. Sergey has a lot of upperbody strength and was doing pretty well with the rings. Valya only this summer learned how to swim. She is fearless in water now.

On the way home, we stopped at Wall Drug. When you are traveling across South Dakota on I-90, it is a welcome oasis in a sea of grassland. Here we were all being pretty silly.

Valya gave a presentation in school called Ukraine Traditions. She described Ukrainian folk life.

Here is a video of a Ukrainian poem that she read as part of the presentation. It is a poem about why the Ukrainian embroidery uses red and black threads.

Two Colors
Dmytro Pavlychko

When I, still young
Set out to go into
The world unknown to me,
My mother gave me a shirt
She embroidered in
Black and red,
In black and red thread,
In two colors, so poignantly dear
Two colors on the linen shirt.
Two colors in my soul,
Two colors, so poignantly dear.
Red is love,
And black is sorrow.
Life took me to distant lands,
But I always came back.
The roads of my life
Are the colors on
My mom's shirt,
Intertwined,
Red and black,
Roads of happiness
And roads of sorrow.

I think this poem is fitting for Ukrainian orphans that are adopted and move to other coutries. Though they become citizens of other distant lands, they are still Ukrainian and nothing will ever change that. I remember once when I was being interviewed by the deputy mayor of Mikolaevka about Valya's adoption. She had asked me if we would help Valya to always remember Ukraine. I told her that while we could take the girl out of Ukraine, we could not take Ukraine out of the girl. She liked that. I blogged about that last December.

In this reading by Valya, you can hear her say Dva Kolori, Two Colors, several times.

When we were at Lifelight, Valya became friends with ALL of the Everfound band members, in fact, with their whole family. They are Russian immigrants and live in Colorado now. There are 6 children, 4 of which are in this band. They speak Russian and opened their show with a song in Russian, which Valya knew from Ukraine. They travel with the whole family so Valya got to know their parents as well. She ended up working in their merchandise booth most of the weekend. Now she has a picture of Yan and her on her nightstand. He is about 1 month older then her. She has all of their phone numbers but I don't think she has called any of them.

In August I joined our church praise team for a concert on Main Street here in Mitchell.

A couple of weeks ago we saw Michael W. Smith in concert in Sioux Falls. Over the years I've seen him in concert many times. This tour is by far his best one, in my opinion. If he comes to your area, you should go. On this tour they put together a choir of local volunteers to join him. Nancy's sister Val and her daughter were in the choir.

A couple of weeks ago, Nancy's uncle Glenn passed away. He was a brother to her mother, the youngest sibling, who also passed away a couple of years ago. Glenn was a widower, and before Nancy's dad passed away in the year 2000, he had asked Glenn to watch over her for him. So for several years Glenn was often around, staying with his sister and keeping her company before she passed away. We've posted pictures of our kids with Glenn on our blog before here and here.

Glenn was buried at a country church, not far from De Smet South Dakota, where Laura Ingalls Wilder once lived and is the setting for some of the Little House on the Prarie books.

Valya and Nancy watch the commital ceremony. She had never been to a funeral before. Sergey didn't attend because he had a season ending basketball tournament.

I wanted to include the next two pictures to introduce you to two of our relatives, Jon and Jill Nelson, from California. Uncle Glenn was Jon's grandfather, and he and his family were in South Dakota for the funeral. Jon and Jill will be leaving soon for Ukraine to adopt one or two kids. We have a link to their blog on the left. We were surprised when they commented on our blog while we were in Odessa. We hadn't known then that they were pursuing adopting from Ukraine. Jill is a correspondent for World Magazine. In this picture, you can tell from her boots that she will fit right in with the other young women of Ukraine.

Here is Valya with Jon and Jill and one of their kids. We had a great time visiting with them at the hotel about Ukraine and our adoptions.

More on the Ukraine Epidemic

2009-11-19T22:12:00.002-06:00

Interesting news clip from Russia Today. The toungue-in-cheek mention of Jurassic Flu refers to the fact that the H1N1 virus was resurrected from 1918 tissue samples, and the corpse of an Inuit Eskimo woman who died of the Spanish flu in 1918 and whose body was naturally preserved in ice. They did this so that they could determine the Spanish flu's genetic code.

A flu virus appears to be an amazing thing as it is able to mutate quite quickly. There is some discussion whether the plague that Ukraine is experiencing now is H1N1, a mutation, or something entirely different. One factor they are investigating is total hemorragic destruction of the victims' lungs, in some cases, which is more typical of a bacteria of some kind rather than a virus, thus they are calling it a pneumonic plague. They are also seeing airborne transmission paths, even through the eyes.

From an article on the CDC's website:

Influenza A virus is capable of rapid genetic change in mammals. Its polymerase complex lacks proofreading capability, such that one in five virus particles produced is likely to contain a change at one of its approximately 13,500 nt (9). If such a change provides the virus with a competitive advantage, that strain quickly replaces its predecessor. In humans, the need to escape preexisting immunity exerts positive selection pressure on changes in amino acids comprising the antigenic sites of the surface glycoproteins, HA and neuraminidase (NA) (6,10). The process of progressive change in the antigenic properties of the virus is called antigenic drift and results in the emergence of an antigenically distinct variant strain every 2–3 years. Between drift epidemics, the influenza virus appears to be antigenically uniform (11), but the degree of genetic uniformity has not been studied extensively.

This is pretty technical, but it is saying,

20% of flu viruses in mammals are likely to mutate,
The mutation may quickly overtake the original,
The presence of antibodies in humans encourages mutation,
A new variant strain results every 2-3 years,
The new variant is resistent to the antobodies of the original.

If you examine the history of the Spanish flu epidemic of 1918, there were small insignificant pockets of outbreaks around the world during the Spring, which eventually died off, but then in the Fall, a full blown pandemic erupted around the world and killed about 20,000,000 people in a very short time. I can only wonder, considering how mobile our society is now, how quickly something like this could suddenly appear all over the globe.

Ukraine Flu Epidemic

2009-11-17T23:04:00.000-06:00

Amid hopes that the flu epidemic has reached its peak in Ukraine, there are reports that it may be worse than feared. I have seen several articles saying that the flu strain in Ukraine hasn't even been identified yet. This is not looking good. I feel for the families having to go over there right now. If you are going, be sure to take face masks with you, as they are near impossible to find there and people are price gouging what is available.

Ukraine and World Pneumonic Plague Information

Georgia President Wants to Impose a Quarantine of Ukraine (will close borders?)

OFFICIAL NUMBERS FROM THE UKRAINE OF SICK JUST RELEASED 11/17/09

Russian Article About Ukraine - Says Not Swine Flu

MILLION HIT BY 'PLAGUE WORSE THAN SWINE FLU'

Ukraine NARRATIVE: the perfect storm? but what is the TRUTH?

doctors learned why Ukranians dying

South Dakota Scene II

2009-10-27T22:13:00.000-05:00

This time of year, the Mitchell airport fills up with private jets of the wealthy who come here from all over the United States to hunt South Dakota pheasants.

Here's another picture from last Saturday when I went pheasant hunting. South Dakota can be a very rustic place, but it has it's own kind of beauty. I'm trying to pick out my favorite picture but I can't decide. I have a couple more I think I'll post besides these then I'll get back to family stuff.

South Dakota Scene

2009-10-26T22:21:00.003-05:00

Saturday, I took off by myself to do some pheasant hunting in a State game area 5 mi. south of Mitchell. I flushed 3 hens, but no roosters. Oh well, it was a nice day to be out and enjoy my homeland. Here is a picture I took out there. It is straight off my camera and not touched up. This is a stand of sunflowers left for the animals with a barren tree line behind it, waiting for the winter snow.

Birthdays

2009-10-23T23:03:00.048-05:00

August, September, and October are now our new birthday months, with each of our kids having a birthday then. Too crazy busy to post regularly, so as has been my pattern, I'll blog a larger post now and then. Here are some birthday pictures.

Valya turned 15 in August. She is almost exactly one month older than Mark, though two grades behind him in school. We get a lot of questions from her about why Mark will get to do certain things, such as drive (!), and she can't. Obviously we can't say it is his age, we just tell her it's because he is in 9th grade. When she is in 9th grade she can take driver's ed., too.

We had two parties for Valya. The first one was a family one on a Fri. evening at Nancy's sisters house, with several cousins, aunts, and uncles.

Valya's birthday was the following Mon., a school day. She had a few friends over for dinner and cake.

The girls did girlie stuff like makeup.

Let it not be said that the Pretre's don't know how to throw a party! What birthday party would be complete without homework?

Even Sparkle was in the party spirit.

Later, our family gave Valya gifts and cards.

With her birthday money, Valya shopped for a dress over the long Labor Day weekend while we were in Sioux Falls for the LifeLight music festival.

Mark's idea of a good party is to have his friends over to play XBox Live and Facebook.

Mark thought it would be nice to wear a paintball facemask to the table.

Unfortunately, Sergey was sick for his birthday. He had friends over for a slumber party but pretty soon he started to feel bad with a fever and so we had to send his friends home. Like for Valya, we had planned to also have a relative's party for him at Nancy's sister's house, but he couldn't go. So Nancy and Valya went up there. Here is Valya with cousin Britta making a blanket for Sergey.

Nancy's sister Karen had given a doll to their mom as a gift. She passed away a few years ago and Karen inherited the doll back again. Here, she is giving the doll to Valya as her birthday gift.

Later, back home again, we gave Sergey his gifts. Here I am, being very cool in Valya's cap and sunglasses.

Sergey loves the NY Yankees baseball team, so we gave him a Yankees shirt and a Yankees blanket that Valya made earlier.

The next night, he was feeling a little better so we had cake, and gave him the rest of his gifts.

Valya gave Sergey a card in Russian. It even had his name printed on it.

The highlight for his birthday was his new iPod!

Sergey's Birthday Today

2009-10-17T20:11:00.001-05:00

Today our sweet Sergey is 14 years old. Unfortunately, he has been sick for the last couple of days and we had to cancel all of his party plans. We'll try to reschedule something fun for him.

Thanks friends for the phone calls to Sergey. One of the calls he received today was from his classmate Andrey, whom some of you know. He was adopted by a family in S.C. and has been home for a couple of weeks now.

I have so much to blog about but it has been so difficult... I just finished a project at work where I had 100 hr. work weeks... Plus other life stuff, too. Hope to update y'all soon.

12 Children Are Adopted in Ukraine Every Day

2009-09-30T13:00:00.001-05:00

On Ukraine's National Adoption Day, a new statistic has been released by the government, stating that 12 children are adopted every day, 7 by Ukrainians and 5 by foreigners.

12 children are adopted in Ukraine every day in 2009
National Radio Company of Ukraine

Kidnapping of Hosted Kids

2009-09-08T20:32:00.003-05:00

Bad news reaching the internet tonight, a man who hosted 3 girls through Frontier Horizon is refusing to return them to Ukraine. Understandably, the Ukrainians are upset about this. He has no legal right to do this and is jeapordizing the future of hosting and adoptions from Ukraine.

Ukraine Says Local Man Hasn't Returned Kids
WFTV

Bootsie Is Gone

2009-09-08T12:33:00.007-05:00

This morning one of our cats, Bootsie, passed away.

9 years ago we bought our first kitten, Patches, to keep Mark company, since he didn't have any siblings. Turned out Patches was lonely, so a week later we bought our second kitten, Bootsie. They've seen their world change since then - we've gotten our dog Sparkle, and have adopted our 2 Ukies. Mark has gotten older and doesn't spend time with the cats like he used to.

Last week Boots seemed normal, but in the last couple of days Nancy noticed that she had lost weight. This morning we found her laying down in their kennel and she was mostly unresponsive and cold. I scooped her out and put her in a box with a towel and took her upstairs for the kids to take turns holding her before school. Mark didn't want to hold her, so I put her in his lap. He really wasn't sure how to handle it. His cats were his buddies since he was 5.

Nancy and I took her to the vet the first thing this morning. The Dr. said that she would do a blood test and try to rehydrate her and warm her up, so we both left for work. About 5 min. later I got a call that she had passed away of kidney failure, but that there was a volunteer at the clinic holding and comforting her when she went, and she died peacefully.

The poor thing, she was only 9. I am surprised at my own grief today. She was my favorite of the two cats.

This is our last picture of her. I took it as we were leaving for the vet's. She died 1/2 hr. later. We love you Bootsie and will miss you...

Finally Met the Wolff's

2009-09-07T14:59:00.005-05:00

This weekend we attended the huge LifeLight Music Festival in Sioux Falls, where we were able to meet the Wolff family from nearby Iowa. The Wolff's adopted 2 teen girls from Ukraine, in fact from the same orphanage as our son Sergey, #4 in Odessa. We had gotten to know the Wolff's last year through our mutual blogs and emails. Like us, they were stuck in adoption limbo when Ukraine imposed adoption quotas last year. They were a source of encouragement for us as we shared that difficult and frustrating period together. Then, with just a few days notice, they got word of their SDA appt. early last Fall. Their blog during their time in Ukraine was interesting, but they have since removed most of their material. However, they have left a few posts up, including the must-read post on The Lie, which should be required reading for all adoptive parents.

It was fun to finally be able to meet David, Cindie, Anya, and Anastasia. We all said we felt like we knew each other even though we had never actually met before. Ah the wonder of the internet!

Her First Birthday Party. EVER.

2009-08-21T12:04:00.007-05:00

Monday will be Valya's 15th birthday. Tonight, we will be visiting Nancy's sister's family to have a birthday party for her with several of our relatives. We will have another party for her here at home with some of her friends on Monday evening.

I was tucking her into bed last night, and she was all smiley. She said, Today was good day. All day was good day.
Me: How come?
V: I don't know. Maybe because presents tomorrow.
Me: Oh you're happy about your party?
V: (Big smile) Yes...
Me: Have you ever had a birthday party before?
V: No.
Me: Not even before the intyernat with your family?
V: No.

Valya was seven when she entered the orphanage. Her previous family life was not good, but even so it took me by surprise that they never celebrated her birthday, not even once. The Andreyevo orphanage would sometimes have group birthday parties in the dining hall where they would have cake (tort they call it). But no decorations and never for just one kid. And no presents.

So tonight, we will add to her list of firsts by celebrating her, and while we're at it, her birthday, too.

First Day of School

2009-08-18T23:21:00.003-05:00

School started for the kids today, Valya is in 7th grade, Sergey in 6th, and Mark is in 9th. The kids had a busy summer, and I must have too, because I didn't update the blog much. I will post again soon. I have pictures from the summer, plus Valya had a big day yesterday in Minneapolis where she took her citizenship oath. Will post more soon.

Summertime

2009-07-22T20:00:00.001-05:00

Summer is in full swing here. I think next week we have all of the kids home again. I think they have all been home together only one week since school got out. And really that is just fine with them. Each of our kids, when they have been the only one here, have told us that they like it when they are home alone with us.

So far, Mark has been busy with 3 weeks of boy scout camp, a week of driver's ed, and a week of basketball camp. He leaves on Friday again for a church youth event in Missouri.

Sergey has been to a week of boy scout camp and a week of church camp.

Valya has been to two weeks of church camp and gets back on Saturday.

Sergey saved up his money to buy a new bicycle. We already had one for him, kind of a mountain bike, but he wanted this trick bike.

Valya saved her money to buy a new digital camera. She bought it while she was in Rapid City to attend a Quinceañera ceremony for Nancy's boss's granddaughter. It is pink, her favorite color, and she is "wearing" it in this picture.

Valya enjoyed the celebration and now she thinks that she should have a big bash like this one. She will also be 15 in August. She reminds us that if she were still in Ukraine she might be married when she is 15 or 16. She loved Sabine's gown and tiara.

We have new friends in Rapid City. Olya is also from Ukraine. She married a fellow that used to go over there on mission trips, and Olya was their translator. They fell in love, got married, and settled in Rapid. Olya is from Mykolaiv, a major city just to the east of Odessa. Olya commented on our blog while we were over there because she was very familiar with the area we were in. Valya often calls her to chat in Ukrainian. Olya has a new baby, #3, for them.

Here is a picture of Nancy and Valya at the party. Valya, like a typical Ukrainian female, is very fashionable. She likes to dress up, more so than the other girls around here. Her summer school reading teacher, and Olya, commented how pretty her clothes are. She will take odds and ends and make ensembles out of them. Here, she just took a scarf she had and wrapped it around her dress. And yes, she loves high heels. Not long ago, she convinced Nancy to buy some high heels, too.

Now that Valya's English is improving, she and Nancy have begun to have girl talks at bedtime. Valya wants to know things like first boyfriends, first kisses and other "secrets". Recently, I have been going through the birds and bees talks with Sergey. I know from the orphanage that he has heard it all, and maybe even seen it. But I'm discussing it with books from a Christian perspective.

Over the fourth of July, we went to a family reunion on Nancy's dad's side. Our Ukies "got" to meet lots of new relatives that weekend. In this group picture, these are mostly cousins, and there were some that weren't even there!

In the olden days, they liked to see the corn, "Knee high by the Fourth of July". Modern corn does much better than that these days. Here are some cousins in the corn.

Another relative that Valya met recently is Nancy's uncle Glenn. He is in a nursing home, and Nancy says that Valya was very tender with him.

Valya has learned to swim this summer and now enjoys the pool. I went down there with her once when the boys were gone and took a few pictures. She is a rascal; just as I would snap the shutter she'd make some face. I took about 10 pictures before I got a good one.

Sergey has been having fun talking with his former orphanage friends from #4 who are now with families here in America. He has talked with Grisha Fumia a couple of times recently. He has been in America for a couple of weeks now and lives in Mississippi. I got to know Grisha fairly well. I made sure I gave him a hug everytime I saw him, "for Ashley". Here is a picture of the two of them taken on Dec. 6, 2008, on one of our first days at the orphanage to adopt him. Somehow, I'd like these two to be able to see each other again.

I've been kidding with the Ukies about adopting 10 kids. In fact, I had even joked about that with Sergey while we were over in Odessa. Valya would be all for it; she really wants a sister. Sergey isn't so enthused. If we had the money, I'd want to do it tomorrow.

Checking In

2009-07-01T23:30:00.002-05:00

Just a quick post here to let you know that we're doing fine.

During June, Sergey and Valya were in summer school, which covered math. Next week, they start the July session where they will be studying reading and writing. We have had a private tutor for Valya, as well, for spelling and reading, and that has really been helping her.

Mark and Sergey have open gym for basketball, and Valya has open gym for volleyball. They are all looking forward to sports in school this coming year. Sergey also is on a rec league baseball team now.

Mark and Sergey were at boy scout camp all of last week. I did not go as I don't have much vacation time built up. I used it all up and then some during our adoption trips last winter. Nancy, Valya, and I did go camping down there last Friday night, though. Valya complained about sleeping in a tent, but I think she kind of enjoyed it. I marked it down as another first for her, in addition to the umpteen other things she does for the first time. For example, last month she let me teach her how to ride a bike, and now she loves it. Sergey, Valya and I went on a 12 mile ride a couple of weeks ago. We also got her into swimming lessons, and now she loves the city pool and goes as often as she can. Mark will be gone a total of 3 weeks at boy scout camp, as he is also gone two weeks as a councilor-in-training.

All three of the kids will be going to week-long Bible camp later this summer.

For the most part, we are keeping the kids busy with activities.

When we went to Rapid City a few weeks ago, I forgot my coat at McDonald's and I didn't realize it until the next day. When we went back to look for it, it was gone. The coat had our camera in it. I had some great pictures of the kids at Custer State Park and I lost them... very disappointing. Last week I finally got a new camera, so maybe I can post some pic's on the blog again.

Here's one from tonight at bedtime as we gathered for prayers.

We often pray for their friends back in Ukraine that they will get families. Valya says that sometimes the girls cry at night. When someone cries, her friends will crawl into bed with her. Sometimes there will be 4 in a bed... We also prayed for the Whaley's tonight. They took their son Sasha along with them to Ukraine on their adoption trip and he has run away. It is very sad. They are adopting two boys from Orphanage #4 in Odessa, whom Sergey knows.

Of Sergey's classmates that I spent time with last winter, I know of 4 that are now adopted - Karina Nasekos, Dasha Strainick, Grisha Fumia, and Lena Hoffman. How exciting to see them with families. 5 out of their 14 have left this year. It must be tough on the others.

Unfair

2009-06-20T00:53:00.006-05:00

A big part of our responsibilities as parents is to teach our kids our faith. While we were finishing up the adoption process in Odessa, I was able to learn a little bit about their spiritual backgrounds.

I was talking with some people who had just returned from a trip overseas
and they could not stop talking about the people that they met -
people that we would describe you know, as "poor"
and yet they were struck with how filled with joy and peace
these people were
They said, "You know, at first we felt uncomfortable, you know, we have so much and they have so little"
but after awhile they started to wonder if in fact they weren't the ones who were actually poor
and so they said "We went to do a good work for them and yet we returned realizing that
we received more than we ever gave."

Both of the kids had been baptized into the Christian faith several years ago. Valya had a grandmother that had her baptized when she was little, and Sergey was baptized along with several other kids who were in a shelter before he arrived at Orphanage #4.

Success can be dangerous, can't it?
We get everything we wanted, only to discover that we're missing something that we had before.

After we came to America, I had asked Sergey about his faith, and did he trust Jesus as his Savior? He said yes, and I asked him how he came to receive Christ, since I have been to Orphanage #4 and I know it is anything but spiritual.

When we extend grace to others in their oppression whatever that may look like
we find out about the grace that God has extended to us.
So when Jesus talks about taking water to those who are thirsty
it isn't just about the necessity of getting water to those who need it,
it's about us being constantly reminded of the gift of water we've had all along.

He told me that Dana Defrees had prayed with him last summer when he was at camp. Wow! Dana is a teenager, and Pam is her mom. Pam has commented on our blog before, and has emailed me privately from time to time. They were on a short-term mission trip to Odessa last summer where they spent time with the kids, along with Grandma Lela.

This is ultimately about the far larger truth that if we each don't find some suffering
and do something about it, we may become miserable -
Our achievement, our education, our wealth, our time and our money -
they'll turn on us if we don't spread them around.

They have a blog called Passion for Ukraine, and it just so happens that the team is in Ukraine again right now! There are some pictures on their blog of Sergey and several of his classmates that I spent time with last winter.

Our lives are either more and more about us -
more stuff, more unsatisfying consumption,
or we're on a different path
and this is why Jesus talked so much about serving.

I am glad that the kids and adults are serving in this way. I am sure that in some cases, this will be the only opportunity that some of them will have to hear about the love of Christ.

May you find somebody who needs what you have
only to discover that they had what you needed all along.

There is a NOOMA video that talks about serving others. It just so happens that I got the link today in an email through Compassion International. I have interleaved quotes from this video by Rob Bell with mine because they go hand-in-hand. This is a powerful video! Will you choose to hang on to that which ultimately makes you miserable, or will you offer yourself to Him and be liberated?

Watch the video to see where the title to this post comes from.

"You Saved My Life"

2009-06-16T23:00:00.000-05:00

When we were in Odessa, we visited a church attended by several college students and missionaries in Odessa. One of the American gentlemen I talked to was in Odessa specifically to minister to street kids. He told me that there are about 800 street kids in Odessa and the authorities mostly ignore them. That way they can sweep them under the rug and not have to admit the problem they have. He and a couple other people go out every evening at 10:00 PM and are out all night. I asked if I could go along sometime, but really, in the midst of our adoption process that really wasn't practical to be out all night. I regret not having the chance to do that, though. One of the times that Nancy, Mark, and I attended the church, one of the street kids actually attended the service. Unfortunately, he slept through much of the service. We were told he comes somewhat regularly.

Another reason I am interested in the street kids is because there was a boy in Sergey's class at #4 who was a former street kid and was severely injured in a tragic fire. He was sleeping in some kind of enclosure one night and some other street kids set his coat on fire as he slept. When he woke he had trouble getting out and was burning as he struggled. Somehow he survived and is now in the orphanage, getting treatment for his burns. We got to know him a little bit and noted his deformed hands and scars. He was always friendly to us.

I surfed into a blog of an American Presbyterian pastor named Robert Gamble, living in Odessa, Ukraine, who also has a ministry that reaches out to street kids called This Child Here. You may be interested in this ministry that is on the front lines in the battle for the Kingdom.

A couple of weeks ago, we were on a road trip out to the Black Hills to visit my mother who was visiting. We were talking with Sergey about his adoption and life back in Odessa, and he told Nancy and I that we saved his life. After looking at Pastor Gamble's blog, it is no wonder he feels that way.

Romaniv Boys Orphanage

2009-06-07T12:25:00.002-05:00

Recently, Valya asked me if we could adopt her siblings. I was wondering when this day would come. She has four siblings back in Ukraine still. Two are already adults, but the other two are in two different special needs orphanages. They are twins, older than her. This situation was very difficult for us as we never felt like we could make them part of our family. In the end, the officials agreed, but the situation was very sad.

The other day, the Cornishes posted a link to this article about Ukraine's Romaniv orphanage. The article hits close to home for me.

Romaniv Boys Orphanage
by Barry Rodriguez
World Next Door

Answer to Prayer

2009-06-02T22:56:00.002-05:00

Very good news today regarding Ukraine's possible moratorium on international adoptions. For "some reason", the vote just didn't show up on the parliament's calendar. We are thankful that Ukrainian children will still have another way to get families. I do not exagerate, I am sure there were thousands of faithful people around the world praying that this would not pass!

Capricious Ukraine

2009-05-28T23:12:00.015-05:00

Word is getting out that this coming Tuesday, June 2, the parliament of Ukraine, the Verkhovna Rada, will be voting on a bill to cease allowing all foreign adoptions, except from Russia. Being this far away, it is difficult to know exactly what is behind it. There is certainly an element of national pride. No government likes to see its children shipped out to foreign countries. There is also an element of pro-West vs. pro-Communist/Socialist politics in Ukraine. The fact that Russia would be the only foreign country allowed to adopt seems very suspicious. As if that weren't bad enough, if the law passes, they say it will take effect immediately, and any families currently in Ukraine to adopt that haven't had court yet will not be able to continue. Think they wouldn't do that? Last year, they suddenly passed a law forbidding unmarried people from adopting. It went into effect immediately and all affected adoptive parents were not allowed to adopt. Our facilitator at the time told me about the women he saw at the SDA crying and pleading their cases to no affect. It is saddening to imagine having established a relationship with a child then being told they could not adopt. Now, we are on the verge of an even more serious development. Personally, I see nothing good coming from this, only bad, so let us pray that it does not pass and that President Yuschenko does not sign it if it does.

Here is an article in English from the Verkhovna Rada's official website.

The Fumia's are in Odessa now to adopt Grisha, a classmate of our son, Sergey. We put several pictures of him on our blog while we were at Orphanage #4. While we were in Odessa, I made sure I gave him a hug every day and I told him it was from Ashley. If this law passes next week, they will not be able to complete their adoption. It will be devestating, as they have been waiting 2 years to do this. Of course, they are not the only ones there right now. Among others, the Hoffman's are also there adopting another classmate of Sergey's named Lena. This is potentially a very grave situation. Ashley Fumia describes it in this post.

We were also minorly affected by the capricious politics of Ukraine last year. Though, it didn't seem minor at the time. About the time we finished our dossier, Ukraine passed a new quota on foreign adoptions for the year, limiting 2008 dossiers to 1,453. We did not make that cut and thought we were shut out for 2008. As it turned out, by the time October 2008 came around, they learned that they were coming in under the quota, so we suddenly found out that we made it in. We were fortunate; we had about two weeks to prepare, but some families had as little as 3 or 4 days notice to be there for their SDA appointment.

Nothing seems to ever be certain for long in Ukraine regarding adoptions. Please pray for this situation.

Here are a few pictures I took on a foggy morning in Kiev on Wed. Feb. 11 2009.

This is the parliament building, where the Verkhovna Rada, or Supreme Council, meets. On this day, they were in session and "friendly" policemen told me were I was allowed to walk. There is an Orthodox cross with a picture of the Madonna in front of the courtyard at the main entrance.

For momths, protesters were camped out in Independence Square, or Maidan as it is known there. At night, musicians would perform in front of these huts singing politcal songs. Basically, they are saying that Yuschenko's economic policies are a failure and they are demanding change in the national government.

On this day, Khreschatyk Street was closed off and a large, organized political rally was taking place in front of the Kiev City Hall. There are three main political parties at the national level, pro-West President Victor Yuschenko's Our Ukraine party, the socialist Prime Minister Yulia Timoshenko's Bloc Yulia Timoshenko, and the communist Victor Yanukovych's Party of Regions. None of them are getting along at all, and the Verkhovna Rada is the laughingstock of Ukraine because of their impotence. It appeared that there were hundreds or thousands of people that came in busses, as they were parked along the street forming a sort of barricade. Many of their bumpers were literally touching.

There were many colorful flags on display at the rally. Of note in these pictures are the white Bloc Yulia Timoshenko flags, the red Communist flags, and the blue and yellow Ukrainian national flags.

Marveling

2009-05-20T23:29:00.006-05:00

We've been home with the Ukies for 3 months, but every once in a while I watch them and am amazed that they are part of our family.

The other day I was watching Valya walking down the hallway toward her bedroom, and it struck me how a year ago it was near impossible to envision her here. Back in Ukraine, I never believed that Sergey would be any problem to adopt, and he wasn't. Plus we had gotten to know him since he was Mark's penpal for awhile and we were able to have him stay with us for 2 weeks last summer. But Valya, she was a complete unknown. We hired a stranger in Ukraine to meet with her to find out if she wanted to be adopted... we waited anxiously to hear back from him... then were thrilled to get 4 small photos by email.

Then, when we were in Ukraine we didn't know for sure that we would be able to adopt her until probably 3-4 weeks after we got there... After we got word that all 12 or so of the officials in-region had agreed... I was talking once with our friend M in Odessa about Valya, and she commented how amazing it was that we came all the way from South Dakota and were plucking this girl out of the middle of nowhere in Ukraine. It was incredible - and still seems that way to me.

So, once in a while, I pause and take it all in, and marvel.

No Way... 3 Months?!!

2009-05-16T19:18:00.051-05:00

May 15 marked the 3 month anniversary of bringing the kids home. I can't say Sergey has changed much, but Valya is at the point where every week her English skills keep getting better and better.

We arrived in Mitchell on a Sunday, and the kids were attending Mitchell Christian School the following Thursday. There was actually no school Monday or Friday that first week so it was a good time to get them in there. Of course, they thought they should have a couple of weeks off to "get used to America", but we decided against that! I told them that they had already missed at least 2 weeks of school, so it was time. Now, this coming Thursday May 21 is the last day of school. We will be leaving after work on a road trip to Rapid City, where they will get to meet their new grandparents for the first time (my mom and her husband).

We have the kids preregistered for summer school, they will go during June and July for four days a week from 8:30 to 11:30 am. June is math and July is grammar/reading/writing/English. Neither is happy about that at all!

The kids are doing well. We have discipline issues occasionally with both of them, but just normal stuff kids get in trouble for. A couple of weeks ago Valya had her first emotional issue, cried a good portion of an evening. We, Nancy especially, just did our best to comfort her. Mark was unkind to her about something, plus she was missing her family back in Ukraine, probably some other things. She was back to her usual chipper self the next morning.

Mark is also adjusting to having siblings, but it hasn't been easy for him. He is working through things his own way. We've seen improvement, though, since that issue with Valya.

Nancy and I are adjusting to a much busier life. More errands, more shopping, more food, more clothing, just more everything.

Though our Ukies are 13 and 14 years old, some days it feels like we have toddlers again. I won't go into details on the blog, though, since our kids look at it once in a while. In some ways they have a lot of catching up to do with age-appropriate behavior. But they are terrific kids and a real blessing to us.

As Valya's English skills increase, she is starting to tell us more about life in the orphanage. She told Nancy the other night how the girls in her dorm would cry at night because they had no one that loved them. She also asked Nancy the night before last why it took so long for us to come get her. How do you explain government quotas? That was unforgivable last year. Thankfully, it looks like this year there are no adoption quotas.

The three months since we have been home have gone quickly. I am looking forward to summer so that we can do more fun things as a family, instead of just homework every night. I am starting to get a little vacation time build up again. My two adoption trips to Ukraine really wiped it out.

Here are some pictures of things that have been going on the last couple of months.

At Easter, we visited one of Nancy's sister's family in Northern Minnesota.

When Valya has friends over, it is almost a sure thing that there will be girlie stuff like makeup and hair fixing done.

Valya's room. She has pictures of our time in Ukraine taped all over her dresser. Some of them are on our blog. On the nightstand next to her bed there is a picture of her with her orphanage director, taken the day I took her from her orphanage. She says that he is a good man.

Valya has discovered YouTube. She loves watching programs and videos from Ukraine. Yesterday she lost computer priviledges for not obeying Nancy and that was painful for her.

For one of his school assignments, Sergey gave a report about the Ukrainian famine of 1932-33. One of my first memories of visiting Ukraine was on the ride from the airport to our apartment, we passed a memorial in a park that was filled with candles and flowers. I asked my facilitator what that was and he said it was a memorial to the 3-10 million Ukrainians that Stalin starved to death.

Valya with some roses, they are her favorite flower. Later, she sprayed some perfume on them and learned that that will kill them.

Mark practices rifle target shooting. He earned the shotgun shooting merit badge in Boy Scouts. I haven't let Sergey handle the gun yet. He would love to but I don't have a good feeling about it. While we were waiting to go over and get Sergey, we had sent him the NRA publication called American Rifleman. It is full of articles and ads about guns. The orphanage boys loved it. Sergey showed it to us at the orphanage and it was pretty worn out.

Valya loves Nancy. Lately, as her English has been improving, we are getting more insight into her heart. She thanks God for this "good" family when we pray with her at bedtime.

Track season came to an end this last week. Mark and Valya both participated at the junior high level. This was the first organized sport that Valya had ever been in and it was a new adventure for her. She loves volleyball and is anxious for Fall for that sport. Mark especially loves basketball, while Sergey loves baseball. Baseball practice has been going for about 3 weeks now. They will have their first game in June.

Mark and teammates watch Valya compete.

Valya gets race instructions from a teammate. She and Mark worked very hard this season.

Waiting for yearbook pictures to be taken.

I felt sorry for the kids a couple of weeks ago. May 7th was Nancy's birthday, and May 10th was my birthday and Mother's day. 3 major present and card giving events in 4 days. The kids seemed to enjoy it, though.

Valya made Nancy's Mother's Day card. She is a good artist. Sometime I will post one of her drawings.

All of our kids were in Sunday school, which ended last week. Sergey and Valya participated in the grade school age program.

Valya has a bright pink feather boa. She stands out when she wears it to church!

For my birthday, we visited the Falls of the Big Sioux river, from which Sioux Falls gets its name. In the picture of Valya climbing up, there is a robin's nest. The mama was nearby squawking quite loudly to scare us away.

My birthday. Valya gave me a card with monkeys on it. It is a joke because I call her my monkey, since she can eat 5 bananas a day.

Question About Gifts

2009-05-08T18:30:00.002-05:00

Tina asks,

Some people bring gifts for people... judge, translator, teachers, etc... Is this expected? What kind of things should we bring? I have seen examples such as: spoons, coasters or perfumes. Any other ideas??

Depending on how your facilitator schedules your fees to him/her, the major gift fees to the orphanage and others may or may not be built in to the fees you pay for facilitation. Your facilitator may ask you to provide other fees as well. Every adoption is different and has different challenges, so you never know for sure before you go exactly what kind of gifting you will be doing. An experienced facilitator knows what is expected in each region and the people there.

We did not directly offer to gift a judge, and I have no idea if our facilitator provided one. If so, it came out of our fees. Ukraine is cracking down on corruption in the judiciary so it's best not to offer anything. If there was a witness to it, it could get someone in a lot of hot water. Let your facilitator handle that.

The economy in Ukraine is a shambles. If someone has been super helpful and you truly appreciate what they did or are doing for you, cash and a box of chocolates or bouquet of flowers are always appreciated. A Mt. Rushmore spoon that you think is cool might not be appreciated. Who knows! If you decide to give a gift other than money, you can get it there. No point in taking it over from America. By the way, many consider the chocolate in America inferior to the Ukrainian chocolate!

Ukrainians are people just like you and me. Don't be haughty or insulting.

We bought a bouquet of flowers for Sergey's orphanage director. Sergey carried them on the 1 mi. walk from the flower shop to the orphanage.

Question About Cash

2009-05-06T22:11:00.005-05:00

Tina Mitchell asks,

I have a problem. We will be going very soon. waiting for our appt. date. Waited to obtain the brand new money from the bank cz' 3 banks told me "no problem".."we can have it in 3 days"...course that is NOT true. Do the banks there accept $50 dollar bills? The banks here have more "newer" 50's than 100's. Are there any other alternatives? Thank you for any help.

Tina, we had about 3 weeks notice for our trip. We went to our bank, Wells Fargo, and they said they were getting a shipment in from the Federal Reserve and they would be getting enough to cover our request. So basically, we just "reserved" it until right before we left. So we had brand new bills, never circulated, that even had incrementing serial numbers. All of them were 100's.

The grivna is the official currency in Ukraine, but there is a shadow economy that uses dollars. There are many Ukrainians that have dollars somehow. Yes, you can take 50's, I even saw people exchanging 20's. The drawback, though, is the number of bills. There are twice as many 50's, of course, over 100's. That's a big deal when you're carrying them on your person in money pouches. You may find your facilitator will ask you to pay for a few things, such as arranged taxis, in dollars. I would recommend taking 5-10% of your money in 50's, the rest 100's.

As I mentioned, our money was brand new. Others have said used bills are OK as long as there are no rips or markings on them. If you have older bills, you can iron them to make them crisp like new again. Some also suggest withdrawing money daily from an ATM to get fresh bills. Others will make an appt. with the bank every week to sit down with an employee and go through stacks of bills, keeping the best ones.

You mentioned banks in your question. We never set foot in an actual bank over there. There are little exchange kiosks everywhere that there are people. You will have no trouble finding an Obmin Valyut, as they are called, because they almost always have a yellow sign posting the exchange rate.

Picking up our cash at the bank. Five piles of $5,000. You would think $25,000 would be more than this - about 1/2" thick stack of 100's.

Question About Police Clearance

2009-05-06T21:56:00.002-05:00

Alycia Goody asks,

Can you please clarify what is required for the Police clearance for the dossier? Is there a need to include FBI prints, or will a local statement be acceptable?
Thanks you.

Alycia, you may have to get several sets of fingerprints. First, there will probably be a set that will be required for your homestudy. That will come from your state dept. of criminal investigation (whatever it is called where you live). That one will probably be ordered by your social worker and he/she/they will "own" the result. Then, you will need FBI fingerprints which are required for your I-600A, and thus, your I-171H. Finally, you will need a statement in your dossier itself, stating that you have no criminal background. So you will almost surely be getting a set of prints for that. I asked our State, if we just did our fingerprints for the homestudy, why do we have to redo them 2 months later? Their reply was that they destroy the prints after mailing the certification out.

Then, if you're like us, you might get to do 3 dossiers because of expiring, in which case you get to do the fingerprinting two more times besides these. What a pain that was for us.

As far as the Police Clearance, specifically, it will be a certified statement from the State, stating that you have no criminal past. It must be certified, equivalent to notorizing, otherwise you won't be able to get it apostilled.

Hope this helps!

Internet in Ukraine

2009-04-28T20:47:00.019-05:00

I have an "open mic", so to speak, for you to ask me any questions you want about adopting from Ukraine.

Dave Baldacchino asks:

I read that you did work while there so I suppose you had reliable internet access. What did you use? Is wireless affordable & reliable? I guess that really depends where you are but thought of asking about your experience in general. I'd like to stay connected and perhaps keep writing on my other blog and do some extra work too/respond to work emails.

Yes, depending on where you go in Ukraine, it is easy to stay connected, at least with mail and blogging/surfing. What I had trouble with, though, was the VPN connection to our office back home. On our first trip, we stayed with a friend at her apartment in Odessa, which had broadband internet. Unfortunately, the service was intermittent. It would be up for 3 min. then down for 2. Up for 2 down for 3, etc. When you're web surfing or doing email, that's just annoying, but it works. However, to use a VPN, I had to log in to the VPN, then start up Remote Desktop, then log in to my computer, which takes a couple of minutes to do. Then the connection would go down and I would have to start over. That just didn't work at all. Another interesting thing that happened was that there was a power surge that destroyed their wireless router and the power supplies for two laptops (not ours, we weren't home at the time). I bought them a new router, they bought new power supplies for their computers and surge protectors! Lesson: Bring a surge protector along rated for 220V.

Using our two computers at our friend's apartment in Odessa.

On our second trip, we stayed at the Odessa Executive Suites, which had excellent internet. Except for about a 4 day period when it didn't work at all because someone stole some equipment at the ISP. I got a lot of work done while I was passing time during the waiting period after court, then early in the morning after I had the kids. When I was alone, there were several days that I never left the apartment, putting in 12-14 hour work days. Since we had two computers, I also had along a little $25 4-port hub that would allow up to 4 computers to share one network cable, in the event there was no WiFi. I did set it up at OES and gave it a try, and it worked, but in practice we didn't really need it because Nancy was only with me at OES for a couple of days before she went back home again. But if you are going to have two or more computers along, taking a hub or router with you is a must in case your internet access is through a network cable only. If you are in a larger city you could buy this there, but it is a hassle and will definitely be more expensive (for example, 20% tax on it).

Kids using the computer at OES. OES supplies a computer in the apartment complimentary, but I used my own. Just plugged the network cable in to mine.

We also had rented a cell phone while we were there from Lonnie Roland, which had internet capability. The phone plugged into my laptop computer with a USB cable and acted as a modem. This actually worked everywhere I tried it - from the car, the train, even from the Andreyevo orphanage when I stayed there overnight. The only drawback was the speed was slow - 56k, and it cost about 1 grivna/minute. So I used it sparingly. I could have used that for our VPN but it would have been very slow. I did, in fact, a couple of times, but only when I was desparate for internet because I had a timesheet due and it was the only way. Lonnie also had a 3G phone available but it was expensive and he couldn't guarantee that we would have 3G service available everywhere we would be going in Ukraine.

Installing the cell phone's modem software on my laptop after we arrived in Kiev and got the phone.

Nancy using the internet in Kiev through the cell phone.

I used the cell phone in the car to post to our blog on long boring trips to Andreyevo. You can see the phone on my leg.

Some have used a Blackberry or other phone to blog and email with. I guess that works but not for a VPN kind of thing. You'd also have to make sure your plan works in eastern Europe before you leave. I say eastern because a lot of times when companies say "Europe" what they mean is western Europe.

There are many internet cafe's in Europe, including Ukraine. We weren't able to find one, though, that let us use our own laptops, which we would have preferred. Also, sometimes they won't let you plug in your own flash drive or camera so that you can upload pictures. They are not very convenient sometimes but they do work when you absolutely have to have internet.

Wherever you will be staying in Ukraine, be sure to make it clear to your facilitator that you want internet access in your apartment. Sometimes they will get you the cheapest place if they don't know that you want internet.

One other thing I noted is that no airport we were in in Europe had WiFi. We were in airports in Kiev, Odessa, Budapest, Warsaw, and Frankfurt (I think London had it but we were in a hurry to get to our plane so I wasn't able to try it). Kind of a bummer when you have a bit of time to pass. One time in Kiev, my flight to Odessa was canceled on account of fog and the airport personnel were no help at all as to whether I would get a flight that day. I would have loved to have had internet then. I had forgotten my phone in the apartment on that trip.

I suggest that you get yourself a little scanner to scan in documents as souvenirs. You won't have them in your possession for very long and once they're given to the next official, you'll never see them again.

The largest "billboard" I've ever seen for a cell phone. This is an ad for Samsung cell phones on the highway from Kiev to the Borispil airport.

Do You Have Questions For Us?

2009-04-26T23:00:00.002-05:00

I saw this idea on another blog recently and I like it. If you are like me, when you were prepping your dossier or getting ready to go over to Ukraine, you have questions that no one is answering or you can't easily find the answers. I want to give you this opportunity to ask me and I will see if I can answer it. Go ahead and ask anything at all related to the dossier, our Ukraine trips, our adjustments, whatever. If I don't know the answer, or out of respect for our family's privacy, can't share it, I will say so. Then again, perhaps another reader may know the answer or is willing to share.

Just leave a question in the comments. I get emails when someone posts so I know that I won't miss it.

I spent 2 1/2 months in Odessa, so I may be able to be helpful. It's a shame to waste experience, so ask away!

Emmanuel Radio

2009-04-24T13:12:00.001-05:00

You may be interested in the Emmanuel internet radio station that comes out of Kyiv with Christian programming. It is evangelical in nature.

We have a laptop computer in our kitchen and I will often put it on in the morning as I'm fixing breakfast for the kids. I wouldn't say that they're crazy about it but they do enjoy hearing programming from back in Ukraine. Plus I know that they are hearing a positive message to encourage their faith. The music seems to vary quite a bit so I think that is why it's not their first choice for music.

Anyway, check it out. It may be especially useful for your family if your kids don't speak much English yet.

You can choose to display the website in English, Russian, or Ukrainian. Click on the broadcast 128 kbps link on the left of their main page.

(Pre) Judging Susan

2009-04-22T22:26:00.007-05:00

OK you're more interested in adoption stuff but I really wanted to post this one.

Susan Boyle is making headlines over here and around the world. Her story is a lesson in prejudging people.

Susan is a 47 y.o. Scottish woman with a dream to be a professional singer. By first appearances that would seem unlikely. BUT... see for yourself.

From this BBC article,

"Last Saturday, viewers saw Boyle, with double chin, unkempt hair, frumpy appearance and eccentric demeanour, step onto the talent show stage and proclaim her dream of being a professional singer.

The judges rolled their eyes and the audience pulled incredulous faces. Onlookers, on set and at home, were rubbing their hands at the prospect of another hopeless, deluded loser being crushed by a withering Simon Cowell insult."

All five of us were standing around the laptop tonight watching the video. The YouTube video has been viewed over 100,000,000 times, currently in 2nd place for all time views. Sergey couldn't understand what the big deal is. Nancy tried to explain to him that the whole world was surprised at how well she sang when she is not pretty like that female judge on the program.

"The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."

1 Samuel 16:7 (NIV)

The Grand Total

2009-04-08T08:00:00.001-05:00

I've been furiously working on taxes, finally got that done last night. As part of that process, I tallied up the final cost of our adoptions of Valentina and Sergey. Total adoption expenses from 2007-2009 were:

$48,640.88

Ouch!

Our Valentina

2009-04-07T08:00:00.002-05:00

I put together a slide show of some recent pictures of Valya. We have more pictures of Valya than of Sergey, because frankly, Sergey doesn't like to have his picture taken too much.

Valya has a distinctive little mole on her upper lip that will always be endeared to me. We had specifically petitioned for her and Sergey at our SDA appointment on Thanksgiving day, last Nov. 27. At the appointment, they showed us two data sheets of the kids that each had a little postage stamp sized picture in the corner. When the lady showed us Valya's, she asked, Is this her? Well, the picture was 7 years old, and the child in the picture had her head completely shaved. It did not look like the Valya we had seen in pictures, except... for that little mole. When I saw that I knew it was her!

The snowy pictures in the later slides were from last Saturday. Our balmy Spring weather has been replaced by snow, but it is beautiful. Now it is warming up again, and quickly disappearing. Valya loves snow and tells me about the way they used to play in it at her intyernat. How blessed we are to have a girl who loves snow, because we do get it here in the Winter. Next season, we'll go to our sledding hill, plus see if we can teach the kids to ski. You people in Colorado I hear you laughing... But we do have a little bit of skiing available in South Dakota! In those pictures she is wearing the coat that I bought her in Rozdilniya and gave to her the day that we took her from her orphanage. You'll see her wearing that coat in our pictures in Odessa and Kiev and the video along the Black Sea last February. But she doesn't wear it too much anymore because now she likes bright colors.

Her English is improving. It is good getting to know her a little more every day. She has a story to tell about her life and we are anxious to hear it. We are getting some of it in little pieces already and it is a sad one.

When you adopt kids there is a time of bonding. It is a two-way street. We often talk of how the kids are bonding with the family, but we also are bonding with them. I think, every day, our love grows stronger for these two gifts that God has given us.

Adoptions News in Ukraine

2009-04-01T23:00:00.000-05:00

You may be interested in these interviews with Ludmila Volynets, the director of the SDAPRC, and her boss, Yuri Pavlenko, the Minister of Ukraine for Family, Youth and Sport. I found this article in English over at Sonia Paz Baron-Vine's blog.

Some highlights:

Pavlenko:

The number of adopted children has finally exceeded the number of bereaved ones.

In 2008, the number of children adopted by citizens of Ukraine climbed above 2,000; 14 of them were HIV-positive.

1,500 applications have lately been filed by the Ukrainians, intending to adopt.

According to new laws that took effect Dec. 1, 2008, officials at all levels are now personally liable for every particular child’s destiny.

The Ministry is critical of facilitators (middlemen).

International adoption can by no means be prohibited, but they clearly give a higher priority to national adoption.

They have no children less than three years old available for adoption.

Foreign families adopt either children over 7 years old or severely disabled ones.

Volynets:

The Hague Convention would be a great benefit in the matter of a full-fledged protection for children adopted by foreign families, and counteraction to corrupt facilitators.

Her primary objective is to make changes in mass consciousness of Ukrainian society.

14% of Ukrainians think themselves ready to adopt orphans into their families.

Pressure is being put on her personally by foreigners who deem the state’s adoption policy inadequate.

Prospective adoptive parents do not very well comprehend that the SDA is not to be subject to their whims.

The SDA’s primary objective is to find a family for the child, not a child for the family.

The SDA is subject to law, it does no good to complain to them about the laws set by the Parliament, "we are to obey the law and not to discuss it".

She thinks it is a mistake that Ukraine is not a signatory to the Hague Convention on adoption, but they will be soon.

Regarding corruption complaints, as private persons, facilitators are protected better than public officials.

There are more complaints against facilitators, than against public officers; most of the complaints are filed by foreign citizens.

The facilitators sometimes do not inform the adoptive parents of the child’s disabilities, or vice versa.

Ukraine needs adequate laws and time so as to establish order and eliminate the abnormal profits drawn by facilitators.

She is certain that no corrupt practice can ever be exercised in the SDAPRC.

Adoptions News in Ukraine
Sonia Paz (Pachi) Baron-Vine

Home Life

2009-03-31T21:00:00.004-05:00

Well we have been home for 5 weeks, thought I'd give you an update on how it's going around here with the kids.

The kids, I think, have been adjusting well to life in America and our family. They are well-behaved so far and are doing well in school, or as well as we can expect.

We enrolled Valya and Sergey at Mitchell Christian School, which is where Mark has attended since he was in preschool. Wow, now we have $1,000 per month tuition. That is painful, but worth it as I can't imagine our kids in a government school.

Valya is in 6th grade here, while Sergey is in 5th. They are both 2 years below where their ages say they should be, but neither child is able to be one grade up, let alone two. It will be interesting to see if they will be able to make up time during the coming years or if they will always be two years behind. I don't like the thought of them graduating from high school at 20 years old, but I suppose it is possible. We plan to enroll Valya in summer school this year, not sure about Sergey yet. Overall, they both enjoy school and their teachers say they don't get into trouble. Valya spends 2 hours a day using Rosetta Stone to learn English. One of those hours, she has a female high school student with her as well to help tutor. Valya is now on the 2nd of the 3 Rosetta Stone disks. At home, her English is getting better. We haven't reached that point yet where she has really taken off, but we can tell she understands MUCH more than she is willing to speak. She is quite a drama queen so it should be interesting when she starts REALLY talking to us!

The kids have the week off this week as it is Spring Break. The school shuts down because the Juniors go on a mission trip every Spring. They went to Jamaica.

Mark and Valya are both in track. Valya will be running jr. high, while Mark will be competing at the high school level. They have workouts every day after school for at least an hour. Valya's coach is trying to teach her to pace herself. As far as I know, she has never participated in an organized sport. She loves volleyball and is anxious for that to start in the Fall.

Sergey is now in Boy Scouts, and his new patrol was just inducted into the troop last Tuesday. He will be going to Boy Scout camp this summer for a week.

Both of the kids have made some good friends. In fact, Valya stayed overnight last night at a friend's house. Sergey has had a friend stay overnight with him here.

Gradually, the kids' taste in food has been adapting to ours. Initially, it was challenging to find things that Valya would eat but that has been getting easier. Valya usually won't eat the school lunches, so we have to give her something to take to school. She especially loves fruit. Valya would eat 10 bananas a day if we let her. When we first got home she would hide them in her room! We have gone through a case of Clementines a week since we've been home, and untold grapes, plums, pears, and apples.

We have the kids attending Sunday School and youth group at our church. They have been enjoying that. Both of the children were baptized into the Christian faith, Valya as a baby, and Sergey about 5 years ago. I posted Sergey's story before. Speaking of which, Sergey recently wrote a letter to his Godmother in Russian, which I scanned in and emailed to her. She was wondering how it was going for him and was glad to hear from him.

We have had very nice Spring weather since we have been home, even with temps up into the 70's, but today we are having a blizzard. Seems like that happens every Spring in South Dakota. Mark and Valya's first track meet of the season was supposed to be today but was canceled.

Here are some pictures.

A couple of days after we got back, Nancy took Valya over to see the Tolly's. Lienna and Tanya were from Valya's orphanage, and it was through the Tolly's that we learned of Valya. She doesn't realize it yet, but she owes a lot to them for their part in finding her a family. This picture shows 2 of the 4 Tolly girls, Tanya and Morgan.

Here is Valya with one of her friends, Ellie. We painted her room bright colors and she loves it. We ordered the bedroom set from JCPenney catalog, but the night stand was backordered and now has been discontinued. Figures. Now we are looking for one for her that will match her new pieces so that she can have a clock and lamp next to her bed. We ordered the pieces while we were home between our two adoption trips in January. That red bag on the bed is the one that I got her at the Privoz market in Odessa the day that I took her from her orphanage. It still has the Lufthansa ID tag attached.

Playing Uno a couple of days after coming home.

The weekend after we got back home, Mark had an 8th grade basketball tournament that lasted a good part of a Saturday. Valya and Sergey came and watched. Valya especially enjoyed the snack bar. Here is Mark in a shootout.

Nancy's sister, Karen, was not able to meet us at the airport when we arrived. She and 3 of her 5 children did come down to Mitchell from northern Minnesota to stay with us for a couple of days. Valya and Sergey got to meet yet three more of their new cousins, Britta, Sophie, and Isaac. They adopted their little boy a year ago, and are in the process of adopting another little one.

Valya with our dog, Sparkle.

Valya with some more of her friends, Kelsey and Kaitlyn.

Valya at home, and on the trampoline. When we first arrived, Energy Girl would get up in the morning and jump on the trampoline before school. Now, she will come home after track practice and jump for a 1/2 hour. And jump vigorously, kicking her legs, throwing her arms, doing flips, running circles. I don't know how she does it.

Sergey at Lake Mitchell.

On one of the nicer Saturday's recently, Sergey and I went on a bike trek to the James River and had a picnic. I showed Sergey some trees damaged and killed by beavers.

Nancy's sister, Valerie, and some of her family stopped in as they were passing through the area, and got to spend some time with the kids.

Here is Sergey working on a Merit Badge for Boy Scouts. He was inducted into Troop 75 recently.

Valya discovered Mark's old scooter in the garage and likes to ride it. I have offered several times to teach her how to ride a bike but she refuses. One time when I wasn't home she got on it by herself and crashed and banged up her leg and foot bad enough that she couldn't run track.

It's never dull when Valentina's around.

Last week, our school had their Fine Arts festival. Mark is in 8th grade and gave his last ever speech for this. He has been doing them since 1st grade. He spoke on his "Spiritual Benchmarks". One of the points in his speech was how he saw God move for us during our adoption trip in December. Sergey read a piece called, "Where is Heaven?" and received a Superior rating. He did a very nice job. I told him that if I had to read Russian I would have received an Inferior rating!

Valya didn't participate with her classmates because she can't speak or read English yet. Here she is with her 6th grade teacher, Miss Fenske.

Here's a picture of all of us together at the school. The week after we got here, we posed for a professional portrait. Our church delayed the church directory until we could get back to have our portrait taken. That was very nice of them.

Ukrainian Baby Boom

2009-03-30T23:52:00.005-05:00

I have posted before about the demographic problem in Ukraine. There is some recent positive news about the birthrate.

"Yushchenko stated that the birth rate in the country has considerably increased. The number of children born per year has risen from 413,000 in 2005 to 510,000 in 2008. As a result, the country’s demographic situation has returned to its early 1990s levels, which in itself is a reason for optimism."

Ukrainian Baby Boom
By Vadym Ryzhkov
The Day, Dnipropetrovsk

Done with a Big Project

2009-03-18T06:40:00.003-05:00

I have had this project at work since October 2008, started just before we left for our adoption trip in November. I needed to make progress on this all during our "vacation" in London and both of our adoption trips to Ukraine. My company has a VPN and I was able to remote into the computer at my desk in Mitchell, wherever we were in the world. That is, wherever we had fast internet. When I remote in, I see my desktop, just as if I were sitting at my desk.

I think back to all of the mornings in Odessa, first when we were staying with our friend M at her apartment, then on our second trip in the Odessa Executive Suites, where I would get up early to work. When we were at M's, at times we had up to 8 of us staying in this small apartment (3 roommates, Matt & Sheila Nasekos, and Nancy, Mark, and I). They have a very small water heater and if you wanted a hot shower, getting up early was the best time to get one. So many mornings I would get up at 5 or 5:30, shower, and work before the adoption tasks with our facilitator.

Then over at OES, during our 10-day wait after Nancy went back to America, I worked 12 or 14 hour days (until our internet went out when someone stole equipment at the ISP). There was a couple of days I never even left the apartment. After I got Valya and Sergey, I worked every morning from about 3:00 or 3:30 until they would get up at 7:30. That was very tiring. I usually fell asleep on the couch for an hour right after supper while they would watch movies, then everyone to bed again at 9:00. Since we've been back home, all of my extra time has been spent on it (instead of blogging!). Now, yesterday, at 4:00, I finally finished it and it is definitely a relief.

Pray for Turners

2009-03-14T12:21:00.003-05:00

Don't usually do this but I have great concern for Jim Bob and Conethia Turner. Many of you know Conethia because she has participated in so many of our blogs, including ours, and has been a great encouragement to us. They are in Ukraine now and have had 2 SDA referrals and neither of them went well. They are heartbroken and so badly want this adoption to work. Please pray that they get a 3rd SDA appt. and that they would find their child...

Haircuts

2009-03-11T12:50:00.011-05:00

We have 29 Blogger followers and about a million lurkers. Thanks for sticking with us waiting for an update from me. It is Mar. 10 today. March 15 will mark one month home as a new family. What fun it has been to have our new kids here.

As you can imagine, this has been a time of firsts for our Ukies, both little (the first experience with an electric can opener) and big (school!).

We arrived in Mitchell Sunday evening, Feb. 15. The next day, we gave the kids haircuts. Sergey was in desperate need of one, and Valya had been indicating since before I took her from her orphanage that she had been wanting to cut it shorter (using charades, snipping with her fingers like scissors). The day I took Sergey out of his orphanage, we walked about a mile in Odessa looking for a barber that could take us in immediately, without luck.

A friend of ours from Rapid City, who by a fortunate coincidence, was in the area and was able to meet us at the airport, is a hair stylist and she stopped in to do the cuts. She is also the one who gave Mark his first haircut when he was a baby.

They did the haircuts while I was at work. After work, Valya would run and hide from me and wouldn't let me see her hair. The reason was because she knew that I preferred it long. Before, when she would show that she wanted it cut, I would say, "no, no, it's beautiful!" Eventually, I was able to grab her and bearhug her and tell her that her new hair was beautiful, too.

She loves her short hair. When she sees pictures of herself with long hair, she says, Bad. Actually, almost all pictures of herself she thinks are bad. I try to tell her often that she is beautiful, maybe it will help. When I tell her she is beautiful, she usually says No! One time she even pretended to punch her face or cut herself with scissors to prove that she is not beautiful. Something in her past has given her a poor selfimage, I do not know what yet.

Cindie gave Mark his first haircut at 12 mo., in Sept. 1995. Valya was also 1 year old, and Sergey would be born a month from then. The seeds of a new family were being put into place on the other side of the world.

This is the only picture we have of Valya getting her hair cut now. She deleted all of the other pictures off of the camera before I could get them uploaded to the computer, including one with a big pile of hair on the floor. She is like that - she will quietly delete pictures off of the camera that she doesn't like, so now I am very careful with the camera and make sure she doesn't delete pictures from it. Sergey has also been known to do that. In Odessa, more than once he deleted some pictures I had taken at Orphanage #4 without permission or telling me he did it. It was only when I'd get back to the apartment that I would notice they were gone.

Sergey would have been just happy if we didn't cut his hair. He wanted it longer. Actually he looks pretty good with longer hair. We will have to experiment with it after school gets out.

After picture with Sparkle!

Blog Overload

2009-03-02T22:52:00.001-06:00

Hmmm... Added a few more blogs tonight... thought I'd count them to see how many we link to... yikes 325!

Homecoming!

2009-02-28T23:30:00.000-06:00

I so apologize to you, our faithful readers, who have been emailing, phoning, and personally asking for an update to our blog. Yes! we are home. We have been home for 13 days. I will catch you all up on what has happened since we've been back, starting with this post, about our arrival in Sioux Falls.

I wrote this post a week ago - I never got it completed then, so I will post it now. I'm sorry - but it's better late than never!

---------------------------------------------------

Well where did this week go. The last time I posted, on Sat. evening, we had just landed in Chicago, where we stayed overnight.

Sunday morning (Feb. 15), early morning, the kids woke up at 2:30 am, awake for the day. They graciously let me sleep until 5:30, when they tickled me awake. On our body clocks, 2:30 was really 10:30 am, which was very late for them, since they always got up at 7:30 while we were in Odessa.

We enjoyed the American breakfast buffet at the hotel. Even Valya found things she likes. She is very picky, not quick to try new things.

On the way to the elevators I noticed the exercise room, so we stopped in there. The kids loved it, especially Valya. She spent an hour on all of the various machines. She is very physical.

We took the hotel shuttle for O'Hare to catch our 1:00 flight to Sioux Falls. On the way to the terminal we saw Air Force One parked there. President Obama was in Chicago over the Valentine's weekend for something. It was fun to show the kids the president's airplane. Our flight was quick - we actually arrived in Sioux Falls 20 min. early. I was concerned about that because I knew that we had a crowd of people that would be there to greet us and I didn't want to get there before them! I made sure we were the last ones off the plane and we walked slowly out of the concourse to give them more time.

Nancy and Mark greeted us at the top of the escalator. She had asked everyone else to wait below so that we could have a little private time together first. We had all been together only once before, on Dec. 27, when we had taken Sergey from his orphanage in Odessa up to Andreyevo to let Valya and Sergey meet for the first time. After hugs and kisses, it was down the escalator to greet our friends and family. I didn't count but I would guess there were about 30 who came to meet us. What a great time we had. Thanks so much to everyone for coming to meet us. It was unforgettable.

And so we end this phase of our adoptions. Now, we are a new forever family embarking on a new adventure!

US Population: 305,818,710 + 2

2009-02-14T23:30:00.000-06:00

After about 19 hours of traveling, we have arrived at our hotel in Chicago. Our two flights today went very smoothly and on-time.

Valentina and Sergey officially became US Citizens when their immigration paperwork from the US Embassy in Kiev was processed at the Port of Entry at the airport. They actually have dual citizenship. At the age of 18, under Ukrainian law, they may formally renounce their Ukrainian citizenship. But until then, they are both Ukrainian and American citizens. The US Embassy in Kiev sent home with us some helpful information that explains all of this. We would have to be careful taking Sergey over there after he turns 16 because they could conscript him into the military.

Our day started at Borispil airport, which is a city about 15 mi. east of Kiev. It is a beautiful drive to Borispil as it is birch forest almost the entire way.

After we got checked in and got our boarding passes, we headed upstairs to the international departures lobby. At the east end of a very large room, there is a collection of booths called Passport Control. It is here that they check your passports, and in the case of adoptions, check the adoption papers.

I've read bad stories about this area on other blogs, so I quick scanned the booths and picked one with a young woman. When we walked up to the kiosk, the lady was wearing an army green military type dress uniform, complete with shoulder placards with some bronze stars on it. That looked very normal. But later when she got up to do something, she was wearing a short short tight miniskirt of the same uniform material, black nylons, and knee-high glossy black leather boots. I mean this is an official uniform. It's very odd to see. Anyway I picked a woman, supposing that she wouldn't be as intimidating as the other guys.

Our facilitor had reminded us to be sure that we brought one of the original 16 signed court decrees granting the kids to us. Yep, she asked to see that along with the passports. Taking about 10 min., she read all 4 pages of the decree, then asked the children, "Do you want to leave?" In unison they both replied "Da". I guess that is the last safeguard the Ukrainian government has in place to protect the children. I wondered what would have happened had either of them said No. We got the approval to pass through to the gate and we were off for Frankfurt, Germany.

While we were waiting at Borispil, we ran into Jim Vanderburg. He was also leaving Ukraine, with his three new daughters. Turns out we were on the same flight out, and our connecting gates in Frankfurt were even near each other. Valya, of course, hit it off immediately with his girls, and they all became friends in a short time.

In Frankfurt, Jim and I spent quite a bit of time visiting about our adoptions, and the girls goofed around like girls do. When it was time for our flights to board, we said goodbyes and traded email addresses and phone numbers so that the girls can keep in touch.

As we were boarding the flight to Chicago in Frankfurt, I was suprised, but glad, that the gate agent requested to see the US Embassy packets for the kids. Yet another safeguard in the system to protect the children.

Our flight to Chicago was 9 hours, which went pretty fast, in retrospect. United gives every seat a video screen with 15 channels or so of programming, plus a dozen music channels. Valya was unusually cuddly with me, which I really enjoyed.

The kids have been great. I've never had one discipline problem in the last two weeks. Everyone was tired today, but they hung in there and never whined or complained once.

When we got to the hotel, we all showered right away, then they both fell asleep watching Sponge Bob. They are both breathing deeply in slumber. Before Sergey fell asleep he commented to me that he couldn't believe that he was in America. I know this is a dream come true for him. What a joy and blessing they are.

Tomorrow, we can sleep in and relax before we catch our 1:00 flight to Sioux Falls. We are looking forward to being reunited with Nancy and Mark as a complete family of 5 again, something we have only been able to do once before, on Dec. 27th last year.

Here are some pictures from a great day.

Jim, Miranda, Karina, and Jessica Vanderburg and us together at about 4:30 AM at Borispil, waiting for our flight to Frankfurt.

Jessica and Valya talk about music.

Last moments on Ukrainian soil, on the way to a new life in America.

Hanging with Sergey as we wait for our flight to Chicago.

Valya saying goodbye to her new friends Miranda and Jessica in Frankfurt.

Thank You

2009-02-13T19:02:00.002-06:00

It is 3:00 AM in Kiev, we are waiting for our driver.

After looking at the comments from our new friends on my previous post, I realized that I forgot to say Thank You! for all of the nice comments you all have left for us these last 2 1/2 months. They truly are a blessing when you are so far from home. Even though I don't make comments on your comments, please know that Nancy and I read every one and looked forward to seeing them in our email every morning.

God bless you all.

Our driver is here, it is time to go.

-- Alan

Finished!

2009-02-13T11:05:00.011-06:00

Embassy of the United States of America
Kyiv, Ukraine

Congratulations on your successful adoption!

Superstitions are for pagans. Today, Friday the 13th, is a day that the Lord has made, and we rejoice in it!

In July of 2007, we started on our adoption of these two great kids. Today, Friday, February 13th, we completed everything. We are done. All that remains is to come home.

We were able to get the kids' American visas today. I must give credit to the personnel at the US Embassy, Officer Egli at the DHS/USCIS office in Bloomington, MN, our social worker, your prayers, and the Lord, for a speedy resolution to our problem.

Due to an oversight on my part, I did not provide our updated homestudy to the Dept. of Homeland Security. Incredibly, I was able to get another updated homestudy from our social worker, and get it processed and approved by the US Government all within 24 hrs.

We lost a day here in Kiev due to my screw up, but as it turns out, we would have lost a day anyway because the machine that prints visas at the Embassy was broken down on Thursday.

We fly out at 5:35 AM from Borispil airport. Ugh, we have a 2:15 AM wakeup call. We will fly into Chicago and stay overnight, then continue on to Sioux Falls on Sunday afternoon. If you'd like to meet us at the Sioux Falls airport, we are coming in on United flight UA5965 on Sun. Feb 15 arriving at 2:30 PM. We would love to see you there.

This will be our last blog post from Ukraine. What an adventure this has been. Our SDA appointment was on Thanksgiving Day, Nov. 27, 2008.

Here's a few pictures.

Valentina and Sergey waiting for our ride to the US Embassy to pick up their American visas. We were also moving from our apartment to a hotel. We had to stay a day longer than anticipated.

The kids playing with $8500 that I paid our facilitator today. This was our 3rd and final payment. They were quite amazed, it is equivalent to 69,700 grivna.

All the running around in Kiev caught up with the kids.

Each child has a sealed envelope that we received from the US Embassy today. We have to keep them in our carry on bags on the airplane and must present them unopened at our US Port of Entry. It contains all of their official immigration documents. The US visas are affixed to a page in their Ukrainian passports.

We also received instruction sheets from the US Embassy that tell us what we need to do at this point. The sheets are very helpful, and start with the quote that I have above.

Visas Tomorrow

2009-02-12T12:25:00.002-06:00

We ran into a complication getting the American visas for the kids.

In our original homestudy, we had listed Valya's age as the upper limit that we would accept, in case the SDA did not give us the referrals we were petitioning for. At the time, that upper limit for us was 12 y.o.

The problem for us has been that our original homestudy for the I-600A was finished about 15 months ago and the kids have had two birthdays since. I wanted to wait until after our SDA appt. to update because of the uncertain situation we had with Valya and her siblings, and also after court in case something unexpected were to come up. But afterwards, somehow, I forgot all about it.

Yesterday, our social worker updated the age limit to 14 y.o. and emailed me the new homestudy, which I forwarded to the DHS person in Minnesota. Today, I also had the US Embassy personnel push for them to expedite. It appears like DHS and the National Visa Center will give approval same day Thursday, which is really remarkable. Thursday in the US is overnight in Kiev. The Embassy has told me to call in the morning (Friday), and we will probably be able to get our visas.

Today, we had our interview with the consular officer. He did a final review of our paperwork, looked at the results of the blood tests, and made me raise my right hand and swear under oath that all that we submitted was true and accurate to the best of my knowledge.

One other interesting tidbit here, Valya needed to have her fingerprints taken at the Embassy because she is 14 y.o. Sergey didn't need to.

We are losing a day but it is working out. So, the tentative plan right now is to fly out on Saturday, stay the night in Chicago, and then fly into Sioux Falls on Sunday. There is something going on back home on Saturday and if we fly in then, no one will meet us at the airport!

Today at the Embassy we saw a family in the American Citizens' waiting room, but we never talked to each other. Later, we went down to the SDA to take some pictures with the kids, and we ran into them again at the souvenir vendors. It turns out that they recognized me because of our blog, but never said anything! They are the Sawchuk family from Atlanta and they adopted two young boys.

Tonight we went down to Independence Square. It was really hopping tonight. There is so much life down there and along Kreshetuk street. I can only imagine what it is like in summertime.

At 8:30 AM today I went sightseeing by myself as the kids really didn't want to get going that early. I walked to the Parliament building and the Presidential Palace. They are far from our apartment, which is across the street from the Kiev Opera House. On the way back, there was a huge political rally down the street from Independence Square. Also, at the square itself there are several tents set up. There are people protesting against the government because of the economy. I'll post pictures when I have decent internet.

Ooops

2009-02-11T15:34:00.002-06:00

This is an urgent prayer request!

We are in Kiev now. The kids had their medical checks and bloodwork today, and we had our first appt. at the Embassy where I turned in the I-600 and other forms.

But due to an oversight on my part, I neglected to submit our updated homestudy that reflects approval for older ages of our children on the I-600A. So the Embassy will refuse to provide visas.

I called the DHS office in Bloomington MN all day today, but they never returned my call. The guy was in meetings all day then left early. I do have the updated homestudy in my possession, and my facilitator printed it out. I will take it to the appointment tomorrow and beg and plead that they will give us the visas. If so, we will be able to leave Friday. If not, we will be here another 5 days because of the weekend.

Please pray for us!

A New Day

2009-02-11T00:18:00.002-06:00

We are on the train, 10 min. from Kiev, early in the morning.

My shirt looks like I slept in it, my hair looks like I just got up, and out our window there is a New Day dawning.

Poka, Odyesa

2009-02-10T15:43:00.003-06:00

We are on the train and the wheels are rolling. We had intended to get 2nd class tickets, but we ended up in 3rd class. They aren't called classes in Russian and Sergey didn't know how to ask for it at the ticket counter. Ooops. I think I am the only person in 3rd class blogging with my cell phone!

Sergey's Godmother stopped by and visited with us on the train until it was time to depart.

We have a seatmate to complete our 4 berths, He is a young guy with a sense of humor, and paired with Sergey, Valya has been laughing nonstop. She is like that.

The next stop in our story: Kiev. Our facilitor in Kiev just called and said that when we arrive at the train station there we will take the kids straight to the medical clinic for the US Embassy's required blood tests and physicals. Looks like we will hit the ground running. I hope we get some sleep tonight.

We are all very glad to be at this point

I was going to post a couple of pictures but they won't go for some reason.